Thursday, December 10, 2015

Friday Randoms

Hi guys, another friday is upon us and quite frankly we should just celebrate Christmas because I am pretty sure if you blink Christmas will be upon us the way the year flew by. It's been such a stressful year for me that I don't know if I want the year to just be gone or if I am scared of what the new year will bring. I am struggling to keep my eyes open as I type this. Old age is real. I am so wiped out. Is it just me or is anyone else mentally checked out of work? Like the spirit is willing especially since I have a lot to tie up before I go on vacation but man, the brain is not willing at all at all. Anyways, let's random.

I really dislike when people say life is not hard and we make it hard. Just because we have food in our bellies and roofs over our head doesn't mean some people aren't dealt an unfair hand and life is hard for them.

The whole rape debacle on twitter just reminded me that e be like say our generation lacks kindness and empathy.

I read an article from a self help writer who said that if you have had the same goals for a long time and you still haven't achieved it, then chances are high that you might not even want this goal you think you want. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people have the randomest deaths. Do you ever wonder how you will die? Would you rather it be sudden or gradual?

The biggest gift I would like to give my daughter is high self esteem. I also wonder what plays a bigger part in having self esteem. Is it enough to just reinforce it and tell them they are awesome and beautiful and smart? or do external forces have more of an impact once they start to have experiences in the real world.

I have these overwhelming moments where I really miss my mom. I still have a strong urge to see a medium and think it will make me feel better if contact is made ( I don't even think I care if I am being lied to). If they say anything close, I am so desperate I'd probably latch on to it. But...my cousin says mediums are of dark/evil spirits or rather are not of God, so I should stay away :(

I have always heard of how big boobs hurt the back, how come we never hear of big butts hurting the back. I was told that it's below the spine so might not have an effect.

Someone had said if people were truly honest about their "how they met" stories or the true story of the roads that led to marriage that it wouldn't be pretty. And it's true. Most people give the neatly tied in a bow story and I wonder why that it is. Not saying it has to be all bad and sordid etc but we all know relationships comes with its own struggles, so a little dent or chink here won't ruin the story - at least to me.

Me being me, I asked said person to tell me her story and I really appreciated it. It wasn't a fairytale and I still find it cute. The couple ended up married even though she wouldn't say she was in love with him, so I asked "did you ever fall in love with him?, if so when?"

Her response:

"Eventually, not butterfly in the stomach, weak knees kind of love, but I know this is my person. Within our first year of marriage. I fell in love with who he was\is, his qualities. Like loving someone because of how much they love you"

I liked that. Remember people. Sometimes what you want is not what you need.

There was a tweet that said stuff about girls having 27 best friends and I have seen comments over the years where people say different friends serve different purposes (Michif has a recent post on this kinda) and I can see that but I just don't get how that serves as a reason to have 5000 best friends. I don't think all friends have to be best friends. I also think your true best friends or close friends can be "everything". I guess the disconnect is assuming that every friend because you are cool is a best or closest friend. They can just be friend.

I was talking to someone talking about a female and she made a comment about some girl isn't a threat because she is not her man's type and he'd rather go gay than get with her etc and my first thought was a lot of women probably feel this way but I don't subscribe to that "not his type" thinking. Women don't see attractiveness the way men do and often miss road and a big mistake women make is they always think when a man steps out its hinged on looks.

Well, that's all I have for you guys tonight. Please, take a stop at www.taynement.com. I have a feeling that this is probably going to be my last post for the year. In case I am right, have a wonderful Christmas and may God be with you and yours. Thank you for still reading my little ramblings over the years. Merry Christmas :)




Wednesday, December 2, 2015

The thing about rape

If you are on twitter, you would have seen the uproar and outrage that went on about rape and sexual assault and we got to see just how far we have to go for a lot of people to understand just how widespread this situation is and its lingering effects. You'd be surprised how many women have a story to tell and are carrying this to their graves.

Anyways, I watched a documentary called "India's Daughter" that focuses on how a 20 year old med student in India was gang raped by 6 men on a bus and eventually died. Guys, it was so horrific. They sodomised this girl with a rod so bad that her intestines were pulled out. The surgeon didnt know how to rearrange her.

They interviewed the rapists (which included a 17 year old minor), their parents, a wife of one of the rapists (who blamed the girl) and the defense lawyers. One of the rapists had no remorse and said if she was a good girl she wouldn't have been out at 9pm. A defense lawyer said if he ever caught his daughter engaging in premarital sex he would personally take her to a field in front of everyone and burn her. I can't even quote all the many nonsense that was spewed. Oh and the documentary wasnt allowed to air in India. At the end of the documentary, some facts about rape and sexual assaault was shared, which is what I wanted to share with you:

Australia: 35% of women have been sexually assaulted. Only 15% reported to the police
Canada: Over 1 in 3 women has been sexually assaulted. Only 6% reported to the police
Democratic Republic of Congo: More than 400,000 women are raped each year
Denmark: Only 1 in 5 rapes results in conviction
Egypt: 96% of women have suffered genital mutilation
Ethiopia: 60% of women have been subjected to sexual violence
France: 1 in 10 women are victims of domestic violence
Nigeria: 10 out of 36 states have laws that allow husbands to use physical force against their wives
South Africa: A woman is raped every 26 seconds
Sri Lanka: An average rape case takes 6 to 12 years to be resolved
United Kingdom: 33% of girls between 13-17 have experienced sexual violence
USA: 17.7 million women have been raped