Friday, June 28, 2013

Friday Randoms

Ndewo my people. Yet another Friday, wooohoo! Hope you guys had a wonderful week in spite of all the many many things happening in the world and in this my wondafu America. Like everywhere you turned, something major was happening. Whoosh. Umm...what else to talk about? I think I don't have anything else to say, so I'll get down to it and just random. Oh, if you'd like to know me a lil better, you can check out my last post where I answered my Liebster questions.

So like, when people feel the need to let a person know they've gained weight out of concern or just because, is it that they don't think the person knows? They live in that body every day, I am pretty sure they are aware.

My friend made a comment the other day that made me laugh, she said she'd love to just eat food for sustenance and not because it tastes so good. She's like food is just so delicious I get greedy. She feels her parents have reached that level and never speak about "ehen go make me that sweet rice you made last week". She feels they just eat cuz they have to.

Speaking of food, so as much as I go to Nigeria every year, I still feel there’s a lot I don’t know about it. Especially how technologically advanced or not we are. Was talking to a friend the other day and she mentioned that she was waiting for her lunch to be delivered to her office. I’d heard of food delivery in Naij in passing but didn’t really know it was a “thing”.  I asked her about it and she told me about the company HelloFood. Dunno the kain curiosity that carried me that day but I looked up the company and was pretty impressed by their website. They offer delivery from a wide variety of restaurants from high end to bukas (Guys this is how I found out there’s a place called “Ofada Hut”. Just like Pizza Hut and its logo lmao, Naijas will never change). Anyways, even more impressive is for those rocking the iphone and androids they have an app where you can order up and save your previous orders. Pretty cool stuff, who knew? So for those of you in naij, you guys can check ‘em out. Sounds like it might come in handy with the famous lagos traffic. Anyone of you guys used or heard of them? Any good?

Do we depict how much fun we have had by how much alcohol was consumed?

You know all that talk about your metabolism slowing down as you get older? So true. That it gets worse or rather stalls out once you hit 30? Even truer.

I think its unfair that I am more inclined to fill out a survey when I receive bad service than when I receive good service. Actually, I only fill out surveys when I hated my service

My floor at work there are a lot of child psychologists that have offices there. It breaks my heart the number of kids I see come in for sessions. There are A LOT.

"I totally believe all things work together for the good. If I had been loved, who would I be? If I had been born, you know, to someone who wasn't abusive, who wasn't such a monster, who would I have been? Because I know it took all of that - all of that hell, all that darkness - to become who I am now" - Tyler Perry (stolen from onakachi) this quote is in vein with when people say the universe gives you what you put out. I question these lines of thought, I mean I can see how but like in the case of Tyler Perry what if he was in a loving family? who is to say he still wouldn't be inspired in other ways? Sometimes, I think some things just are but as human beings we feel we need to have some deep(er) explanation to things.

When typing in broken/pidgin english eg the boy no dey fear. I have noticed some people type no as nor. why is that? isn't the actual word no? we don't pronounce it as nor so why the r? answers greatly appreciated.

Sometimes I wonder why things don't move me. I see people being emotional about books, words strewn so beautifully, weddings or heck even happenings in the country/history being made. I mean I think aww nice but to be so moved to the point sometimes of tears, I dunno it's foreign to me. To be fair, I was moved when I voted for Obama, it was all a bit surreal but other than that I can't think of a lot of other things. 

Someone told me about a woman who decided she will never get married and asked her gay friend to be her sperm donor. I was so sure that she would have changed her mind and got married but 8yrs and a son later she still isn't married and still staunch about it. Found it interesting.

Ok guys that's all I have! Hopefully I hope this isn't too much info. Have a lovely weekend and stay blessed!

Don't forget to check out and for you book readers you might be interested in the 20 best books of the year so far post. Give you a boost in your reading list. If you visit feel free to use the buttons below and share with your friends via facebook, twitter, google+ or any other way. Thanks!

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

My Liebsters

It's taken me a while but I am finally getting around to doing and answering my Liebster award questions. Well I am supposed to list 11 random things abut me then answer the questions that I was asked. Well here goes.

11 Random Things

  • I am deathly afraid of dogs. It is quite embarrassing really. I don't care if it is a puppy. My fear is real.
  • I hate tomatoes. I always pick it out my sandwiches or request for it to be taken out. But I like stew.
  • Even though they are technically the same thing, I prefer gummy worms to gummy bears.
  • I hate shoes. They are pretty yes but they are devil contraptions. They hurt and suck. I guess high heeled shoes?
  • I am all of 5'3
  • I have mild ocd (kidding of course). I may or may not have not gone to an ATM because it is on the "wrong side of the road"
  • I am also scared of heights but will try almost everything once. So in spite of my fear, I have rappelled down a 15 story building, gone on stupid scary rides and para sailed. I draw the line at skydiving or bungee jumping. That will never happen.
  • I am a miles whore. I get giddy counting/checking my airline miles. I love watching them stack up and need to be talked into using them.
  • I really enjoy concerts and have been to a number of them by myself.
  • I LOVE to dance. I'm not sure it is possible for me to sit still while music is playing. Back in the day, I was a part of a world/hip hop dance group called ORIZON where we performed at different venues and I got to choreograph an African dance routine.
  • I have visited the Berlin wall and also the Nazi Concentration Camp in Auschwitz. It was awful. That's all I can say.
Berry's Questions

  • Why is your blog name what it is?  - I am a pop culture head and I love entertainment, so it is a play on words on that
  • Who's your favorite celebrity and why? - that's tough but probably between Simon Cowell - he's a softie and a direct person and Justin Timberlake - he is very talented and I admire talented people.
  • What color shoes are you wearing right now? - none
  • Would you wear an engagement ring on your middle finger or fourth finger? fourth
  • What's your dream vacay destination? I always said Costa Rica. Now I have forgotten why
  • #TeamNatural, #TeamRelaxed, or #TeamItsJustHairChillOut? Team Relaxed all day
  • When was the last time you prayed? This morning
  • What's your favorite color? Black
  • What number child are you? 1
  • What's the last meal you cooked? Herbed rice and baked fajita chicken
  • Would you rather do 100 jumping jacks or 75 squats? 100 jumping jacks

  • The Vegan Nigerian's Questions
    1. Why did you start blogging? I read a story on how Diablo Cody (writer of Juno) was discovered via blogging. So I started blogging in the hopes of being discovered. 6 years later and no discovery.
    2. If you could be any fruit or vegetable, what would you be? - Pineapple. delicious but could be tart or sweet.
    3. Would you every consider becoming a vegetarian/vegan? Yes. Could I go through with it? Nope
    4. What was/is your favourite subject at school? English/Marketing
    5. Are you scared of the dark? Nope
    6. If you could eat only one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be? So many to choose from. Plantain
    7. Favourite movie of all time? House of Sand and Fog
    8. If you could change your name to anything, what would your new name be? Toni
    9. Are you much of an adventurer? I'm talking bungee jumping, mountain climbing and all that jazz? You know, I really don't know where to classify myself. I think I am in the middle.
    10. What's the greatest thing about being your nationality? Man, so many things. Our food, music, manners etc
    11. What do you do to keep fit? Try to work out and then ruin it with my awful diet.

    Ada in Progress Questions
    •  If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be? - plantain
    • Who's your celebrity crush? - too many men
    • Are you happy with your current spiritual life? Nope. It's plagued by doubt and questions
    • What's one of your biggest beauty secrets? - lol Natural blessings from God?
    • Have you ever dated someone outside of your race? Be specific:) - relationship? no date? yes. White and Hispanic
    • What are your top 3 favorite movies? *blank*
    • What's your favorite book of all time? The Diary of Anne Frank
    • Which places do you want to visit in your lifetime? At least one country in every continent
    • If you could have a conversation with one deceased person, who would it be and why? I can't think of anyone
    • Does your job feel like pleasure or pain? Pleasure. The pain only comes with having to wake up at 7am
    • What's your favorite part about blogging? Being able to reach people. Having people appreciate the words you put out. Reading and learning and meeting other bloggers. Finding out that you are not alone in some thoughts.
    Whew! I did it. Thanks again to you guys that nominated me. Anyone who feels like doing it is free to! Have a wonderful week and catch you on Friday for randoms.

    Wednesday, June 19, 2013

    Blunted on Reality - Book Review

    I was contacted by the author to do a review for his book, Blunted on Reality. Chinedu Achebe (no relation to the great Chinua Achebe) is a Nigerian author based in Houston, TX. The book centers around main character, Obi Ifeanyi who is about to turn 30 and wanting more in his life. He faces the dilemma most young people face today regarding career and their personal lives. Obi is torn between staying in his comfortable job where he is making good money but is still lacking something or venturing out and doing more community stuff. In his love life, he is torn between his African American on and off girl, Tamika and fellow Nigerian who he had gone to college with, Nkechi. The story is told with the focal point being the election of Obama as President and how it affected African Americans and Nigerian Americans alike. The book touches a lot on politics, race, doing more for the community and various topics and stereotypes as viewed by Nigerians.

    What did I think of the book?

    I thought the overall message of the book was nice and relatable in terms of being a black/Nigerian person in America or having Nigerian parents overseas. The language would be familiar. I would hate to compare it to Americanah because there is a difference but the similarity of love stories interwoven through political topics is there. I felt the message of the book also made you think, in terms of what can you do better or what more can you do to contribute to society but overall I think it was not executed or conveyed very well. There were a lot of grammatical, spelling and tense errors which could spoil your groove. You could tell the author infused some of his own personal experiences into the book but it was like he wrote as he spoke without some editing and creativity to the story line. The book does get detailed in describing the sex scenes. I think what bothered me the most was for a book with a positive storyline about educated youth trying to do better and contribute to society, the language used in their regular conversations didn't quite match up with a lot of cursing and the use of the n word to address each other, almost as if the characters were trying too hard to be cool.

    Overall, it is a book where you can tell it is the author's first book and he had achieved a dream of publishing a book, for which I have to give kudos because completing a book or any dream at all is no simple feat. If you would like to support the author the book can be found on Amazon or Barnes & Noble for $4.99. It's an easy read, so feel free to support a brother. If you have or plan to read it, what did you think of it?

    PS The title of the book is also the title of the Fugees debut album. The Fugees happened to have a concert in the book and I suspect is a favorite of the author's.

    Friday, June 14, 2013

    Friday Randoms

    Another Friday, Another Weekend! yippee! I get to be home this weekend and I am excited about that. I can finally unpack and clean and buy food for this house and get some things done. It's been a long week but we thank God for the gift of life. I just marathon'd the show Orphan Black and man I have to say it lived up to it's hype. It's such an original concept - well I haven't heard of it before and the actress who plays all the different characters is pretty damn fantastic. All of Season 1 is on On Demand so catch it if you can, it's just 10 episodes. Ok let's random.

    I get that Heartbreak sucks and all but man, killing yourself over a guy/girl is some deep stuff. It's never that serious...or maybe it is.

    Ladies, do you feel some type of way when you don't have a "toaster"? It seems a lot of people find it strange /hard to believe when a woman doesn't have a toaster. I have also encountered some women who feel they  have to have someone in the wings whether they like them like that or not, it's a sort of ego booster i guess?

    I don't really expect anyone to tell me their sex woe tales but based on what I am told, it would appear a good number of my friends are freaky and having fantastic sex, which is a good thing. Everyone should have good sex in their lives.

    I read something this week that is a work in progress for me, which is recognizing to treat everyone's problems as such and not disregard/minimize them because it pales in comparison to what I deem problems. Because, to be fair, what I consider problems could be nothing to someone else. Man, it's a hard lesson for me to learn. Very hard.

    You know, I would never wish anyone death at all. But with Mandela being in the hospital once again and seeing everyone wanting him to pull through, I kinda wonder the guy is really, really old. All this constant hospital visits have to take a toll on him. He's lived a good life and made a mark on the world, would it be so terrible to wish him peace?

    What do you do if you had a great marriage and your spouse dies. After he dies, you find out he/she was cheating on you? Does him/her having a child too from the affair make it worse?

    I really don't like stockfish.

    Do you think two people have to be in love to get married? I have a preference to be in love with who I marry but seeing as I think love is a fleeting thing am I contradicting myself? I have a couple of guy friends who weren't in love when they got married. I don't know any females though who did, would be interesting to hear their take on it. Personally, I don't think you have to be in love to get married but ehn, what do I know?

    Was talking to a married friend of mine and asked why he married his wife, basically why her over everyone else? and he said: "I stayed because I chose not to hurt her. I knew I'd hurt her by leaving and I wouldn't leave unless I absolutely had to and I didn't have a reason to, so I stayed. I told myself unless she gave me a reason to I'd stay as long as she wanted me to. The grass is always greener if u keep looking over  the fence you'll keep jumping lawns"

    Sidebar: I agree with the fence part cuz honestly, there will always be someone better than you/your partner but at some point you just have to make a decision and stick with it.

    Some other excerpts from our convo:

    "We all define love differently but at the end of the day, commitment shows you love someone and if you say you don't love them and you are just committed to them, that is really all marriage is - commitment.

    "People always say if you love me why would you cheat on me? The answer is simple - I love you, but I love me first"

    "If you marry cos the person gives you butterflies in your tummy, dem butterflies hibernate occassionally.
    Marriage is putting your feelings aside and riding it to the end. Unless you have reason to bounce, your feelings
    aren't good enough reason to"

    So that's all I have for you folks. I would love to hear what you think, especially on the last few, cuz I am sure some of you would disagree with it. Have a lovely weekend and remain blessed!

    Also, don't forget -

    Tuesday, June 11, 2013

    After A While

    My friend told me about this poem but she couldn't remember who it was by. I found it on the interwebz and it is by Veronica A Shoffstall.

    Here it is:

    After a while you learn the subtle difference
    Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
    And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
    And company doesn’t mean security.
    And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts
    And presents aren’t promises,
    And you begin to accept your defeats

    With your head up and your eyes open
    With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child,
    And you learn to build all your roads on today
    Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans
    And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
    After a while you learn…
    That even sunshine burns if you get too much.

    So you plant your garden and decorate your own soul,
    Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
    And you learn that you really can endure…
    That you really are strong
    And you really do have worth…
    And you learn and learn…
    With every good-bye you learn

    I found a blog that didn't quite agree with the message of the original poem so she rewrote it. She says, "This was a poem that resonated strongly with me throughout my childhood. I hadn’t thought of it in ages, but happened to see it online today. What’s funny is that because I was raised with this lesson, what I haven’t learned is how to allow someone to bring me flowers instead of insisting that I can get myself my own damn flowers if I want any". This rewrite is by Healthy Curls:

    After a while you learn the subtle difference
    Between holding a hand and letting go of self,
    And you learn that it’s okay to lean on others
    And sometimes you need the security of companionship.
    And you begin to learn that some kisses are meant as contracts
    And, sometimes, a present is a promise of friendship and fidelity,
    And you begin to accept that you are successful

    With your head up and your eyes open
    With the confidence of a woman, not the insecurity of a child,
    And you learn to build your roads towards tomorrow
    Because today is just a path towards where you want to be
    And your future is what you choose to make of it.
    After a while you learn…
    That the bright light of day helps a soul grow and flourish.

    So you plant your garden and decorate your soul,
    But you love and appreciate the people who bring you flowers.
    You learn that you really can be loved…
    That you really are strong
    And you really do have worth…
    And you learn and learn…
    With every hello,
    With every goodbye,
    With every day you live,
    You learn.

    What do you guys think? I love the rewrite.

    Thursday, June 6, 2013

    Friday Randoms

    Howdy folks. I only skipped one week of randoms and I feel like I missed many weeks. I don't know about your area but boy have we been getting rain in these parts. Like lots of rain at random times. Last night, the thunderstorms were so loud, I just lay there listening to it. My throat is quite itchy right now and I have been so fatigued lately. I have been taking my vitamins o, so I hope I am not coming down with something. The Spurs just beat The Heat and I am quite pleased about it. Not invested in either team, actually sat out the season cuz The Mavs just weren't it this season but I do NOT like The Heat. I am not sure I even remember why but I think it was back in the beginning when the Big 3 was formed. Just didn't care for their cocky addition to whooping us in 2006. hehe so go spurs. Before I random, Happy Happy birthday to my CILy. Hope you have a wonderful day and wishing you the best. Love you loads. Ok time for me to gab.

    I watched the Mirrors video and I know I have randomed before about young people losing their significant others early but it had me thinking about old people who lose their significant others. Where do you start from? Someone you have spent more than half your life with and established a routine. Has to be so painful.

    What do you call it - akamu? pap? or ogi? I think I call it pap but i honestly can't remember.

    I think what I like the most about this love thing is the acceptance part of it. Where the partner still loves and accepts the person for who they are or in spite of what they may have done. You see some people like Keke Wyatt or people you think are so strange that you will never if it were you. But then you are reminded that there are people who love them as is. I was watching "I'm married to a.." and this transexual lady who still has a penis has a husband who just loves her/him for what he/she is. It gives some kind of hope that there is someone for everyone. Well, unless you're K Michelle. Ok that was mean.

    A guy friend was saying how women enjoy the most during sex. He said for guys it's mostly mental the entire time right up until they bust a nut but for women it's mostly a pleasure thing. I can see that for a new relationship or random hookup but does this still apply when you've been together a while and are all old and married and had sex all types of way you can think of? Fellas, if you are reading i'd like to get your opinion on this.

    So Scott Disick was telling a story of how he and Kourtney were having sex while he was driving. I just wondered, fellas would you let a girl blow you while driving? ladies, would you blow a guy while he is driving? If you have, would you do it again. I just can't see how a guy can still concentrate while getting head and is it worth the risk of an accident? A friend just told me of an article about a couple who got into an accident cuz she was blowing him.

    Some people don't believe in family members flying together, just in case. I have never understood that. Does that mean they don't drive together either? or walk together? The probability of dying in a car crash is higher than flying accident. I also don't think you can control fate/destiny like that.

    I was having a convo with a friend today about believing God has a hand in everything. Somehow it evolved into me saying that I feel some things do have God's hands in them but some things just are. I gave an example of how say you have unprotected premarital sex and you then pray to God to not get pregnant. I think that's weird.

    One of my favorite nicknames that I've been called is Pint Sized Terror

    Today someone tweeted about a neighbor that has been looking to have a child for 15 years and died today during childbirth. I'm just like why? Why is life so unfair? Why couldn't she have caught a break?

    Watching Braxton Family Values and Toni and Babyface were having a conversation about relationships and she said sometimes its not the end of the relationship that hurts, it's just how they move on and how fast. Babyface says are they supposed to wait? Toni says no but they also aren't supposed to move on so quickly.  I think for me it's just like if you can move on that fast it gives the impression like what you had never meant anything or didn't hold that much weight.

    Kim Kardashian found out the sex of her baby with her mom and sisters and not her baby's dad. Do you think that's weird? Would you rather find out with your mom or your husband or baby's father?

    That's all I got for ya folks. Have a wonderful weekend and stay blessed and safe.