Thursday, December 10, 2015

Friday Randoms

Hi guys, another friday is upon us and quite frankly we should just celebrate Christmas because I am pretty sure if you blink Christmas will be upon us the way the year flew by. It's been such a stressful year for me that I don't know if I want the year to just be gone or if I am scared of what the new year will bring. I am struggling to keep my eyes open as I type this. Old age is real. I am so wiped out. Is it just me or is anyone else mentally checked out of work? Like the spirit is willing especially since I have a lot to tie up before I go on vacation but man, the brain is not willing at all at all. Anyways, let's random.

I really dislike when people say life is not hard and we make it hard. Just because we have food in our bellies and roofs over our head doesn't mean some people aren't dealt an unfair hand and life is hard for them.

The whole rape debacle on twitter just reminded me that e be like say our generation lacks kindness and empathy.

I read an article from a self help writer who said that if you have had the same goals for a long time and you still haven't achieved it, then chances are high that you might not even want this goal you think you want. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people have the randomest deaths. Do you ever wonder how you will die? Would you rather it be sudden or gradual?

The biggest gift I would like to give my daughter is high self esteem. I also wonder what plays a bigger part in having self esteem. Is it enough to just reinforce it and tell them they are awesome and beautiful and smart? or do external forces have more of an impact once they start to have experiences in the real world.

I have these overwhelming moments where I really miss my mom. I still have a strong urge to see a medium and think it will make me feel better if contact is made ( I don't even think I care if I am being lied to). If they say anything close, I am so desperate I'd probably latch on to it. But...my cousin says mediums are of dark/evil spirits or rather are not of God, so I should stay away :(

I have always heard of how big boobs hurt the back, how come we never hear of big butts hurting the back. I was told that it's below the spine so might not have an effect.

Someone had said if people were truly honest about their "how they met" stories or the true story of the roads that led to marriage that it wouldn't be pretty. And it's true. Most people give the neatly tied in a bow story and I wonder why that it is. Not saying it has to be all bad and sordid etc but we all know relationships comes with its own struggles, so a little dent or chink here won't ruin the story - at least to me.

Me being me, I asked said person to tell me her story and I really appreciated it. It wasn't a fairytale and I still find it cute. The couple ended up married even though she wouldn't say she was in love with him, so I asked "did you ever fall in love with him?, if so when?"

Her response:

"Eventually, not butterfly in the stomach, weak knees kind of love, but I know this is my person. Within our first year of marriage. I fell in love with who he was\is, his qualities. Like loving someone because of how much they love you"

I liked that. Remember people. Sometimes what you want is not what you need.

There was a tweet that said stuff about girls having 27 best friends and I have seen comments over the years where people say different friends serve different purposes (Michif has a recent post on this kinda) and I can see that but I just don't get how that serves as a reason to have 5000 best friends. I don't think all friends have to be best friends. I also think your true best friends or close friends can be "everything". I guess the disconnect is assuming that every friend because you are cool is a best or closest friend. They can just be friend.

I was talking to someone talking about a female and she made a comment about some girl isn't a threat because she is not her man's type and he'd rather go gay than get with her etc and my first thought was a lot of women probably feel this way but I don't subscribe to that "not his type" thinking. Women don't see attractiveness the way men do and often miss road and a big mistake women make is they always think when a man steps out its hinged on looks.

Well, that's all I have for you guys tonight. Please, take a stop at www.taynement.com. I have a feeling that this is probably going to be my last post for the year. In case I am right, have a wonderful Christmas and may God be with you and yours. Thank you for still reading my little ramblings over the years. Merry Christmas :)




Wednesday, December 2, 2015

The thing about rape

If you are on twitter, you would have seen the uproar and outrage that went on about rape and sexual assault and we got to see just how far we have to go for a lot of people to understand just how widespread this situation is and its lingering effects. You'd be surprised how many women have a story to tell and are carrying this to their graves.

Anyways, I watched a documentary called "India's Daughter" that focuses on how a 20 year old med student in India was gang raped by 6 men on a bus and eventually died. Guys, it was so horrific. They sodomised this girl with a rod so bad that her intestines were pulled out. The surgeon didnt know how to rearrange her.

They interviewed the rapists (which included a 17 year old minor), their parents, a wife of one of the rapists (who blamed the girl) and the defense lawyers. One of the rapists had no remorse and said if she was a good girl she wouldn't have been out at 9pm. A defense lawyer said if he ever caught his daughter engaging in premarital sex he would personally take her to a field in front of everyone and burn her. I can't even quote all the many nonsense that was spewed. Oh and the documentary wasnt allowed to air in India. At the end of the documentary, some facts about rape and sexual assaault was shared, which is what I wanted to share with you:

Australia: 35% of women have been sexually assaulted. Only 15% reported to the police
Canada: Over 1 in 3 women has been sexually assaulted. Only 6% reported to the police
Democratic Republic of Congo: More than 400,000 women are raped each year
Denmark: Only 1 in 5 rapes results in conviction
Egypt: 96% of women have suffered genital mutilation
Ethiopia: 60% of women have been subjected to sexual violence
France: 1 in 10 women are victims of domestic violence
Nigeria: 10 out of 36 states have laws that allow husbands to use physical force against their wives
South Africa: A woman is raped every 26 seconds
Sri Lanka: An average rape case takes 6 to 12 years to be resolved
United Kingdom: 33% of girls between 13-17 have experienced sexual violence
USA: 17.7 million women have been raped

Friday, November 20, 2015

Friday Randoms

Howdy Ho peoples. How are you? Hope you are doing well. As for me, I am very tired and I am so glad it is Friday. I just got back from vacation and catching up to the real world just tired me out. You know, sometimes I think vacations are a scam. You are supposed to go and be all rejuvenated but one day back into the real world and everything is all wiped out. But I think I am extra tired because it was multiple destinations and just before I left I had traveled for work and basically came home and swapped suitcases. So I haven't had the time to catch my breath. My poor babies are suffering and by poor babies I mean my tv shows. I have been trying so hard to catch up and with all the new releases, I am so behind! *sobs*. How about this global warming fall we are having I don't know whether to be scared or be happy. Anyways, let me get to random-ing.

When Mark Wahlberg hosted the Pope's visit to Philly, there was a moment where he told the Pope that he gives God all the credit for all the blessings in his life. Which I get. But then my first thought was of Ted the movie  and Entourage and how raunchy/offensive they were but they made him money, do you consider that from God?

I can't imagine what first time sex is like for a gay man. Then again, I just learned that there are some tops who have never been bottoms so have never received. How do they establish their positions when they first meet? What if it is like a one night stand? How do they discuss and establish who is getting it?

I still don't understand how there are Nigerians in America who were raised in Nigeria who don't care about genotypes.

I couldn't remember if I had randomed about this before or tweeted about it but just like you can identify those with new money, you can also identify those who are new *insert what applies* . I think they could also be considered like late bloomers who are doing things at a much later time but feel the need for it to be publicly known.

Who was the first person to go skydiving? Like, by jove you know what? I am going to fly way up high into the sky and jump down to the ground. Whee!!! :/

Someone described the loss of a parent as like losing the last/only person that would ever truly love you for who you are. So apt.

If I was ever given one wish in the world, it would be complete and utter trust in God and believing that he will take care of me.

Do you personally know a social climber?

Watching a show and the lady said that she doesn't like the process of opening up and trusting and getting to know people which is why she always goes back to exes. Made sense.

Am I a bad black person because I don't get offended by some of these outrages? I felt no anger because Asis Ansari or Mindy Kaling don't date white people on their show. Welp!

In this week's edition of my singledom, I was given advice to stop wearing my glasses out and wear makeup more :( #foreveralone

Going through Sabirah's comments in her Thursday tidbits and a commenter mentioned how she knows deep down she doesn't want to get married and felt relief at the break up of her relationship and I thought that was really honest of her. I always admire when Nigerians are honest about their stances on things. Same person asked the question "Do people ever believe you when you tell them who you are?" and I thought that was so true. People stay fixated on their ideology of you or what they want you to be.

Anyways that's all I have for you folks. Please help a sister out and visit www.taynement.com.  I hope you all have a pleasant and wonderful thanksgiving. Be sure to find at least one thing to be grateful for and hope you will be around people you love. Have a wonderful weekend and be safe.


Wednesday, November 4, 2015

Thy Will Be Done

I am pretty sure that at some point, I have blogged or wondered what the point of prayer is when at the end of the day, it all depends on the will of God.

Let me backtrack a little. Something I have also said before is that I don't believe that being a positive, happy go lucky person guarantees or brings you good things. It just means you can handle things better and it's also just a better attitude to have in this tough world we live in.

I was in a discussion where people vehemently disagreed with me on this and said when you pray hard and think positively about something and believe it then it comes to pass. Which is all great and dandy but I've thought about it and whatever hope there was in me believing it, it was dashed when my mom passed away. I don't think I believed anything harder or was so sure about someone pulling through. So that's where I stand and I kinda don't like feeling guilty or made to feel guilty for having that stance.

Anyways, it brings me to the point where people always end things with at the end of the day let the will of God be done. I can roll with that. I also roll with not understanding what the cotdamn big picture is but He knows better, abi? The long and short of my story is it took me some time to get to this place. I now accept his will is ultimately what matters. It was funny that while going back and forth in my mind I came across a lot of bible meditations and verses that talked about accepting the will of God.

And then the crux of it, when I was thinking of what to post...sometimes when I think or miss my mom, I go through my old emails and read emails we sent to each other because we emailed a lot and what did I run into yesterday but this...coincidence, huh? I can just hear preaching to me and me saying "yes mommy, i've heard" Love you momma.

Here's what I came across from her:

Finding God's Will
By Elaine Creasman

As I have been facing a difficult challenge lately, I find myself crying out to God, "What should I do?" Which way to go seems unclear. I want to do what's right, but every choice seems to have its drawbacks.
Slipping into negative emotions and negative thinking makes things even murkier.
"Please show me Your will and Your way," I have prayed.
What God has done is to reveal to me the next step to take. He doesn't show me the complete picture of where He's leading me and how He will bring me to the other side.
The key is to believe He will show me His will, and He will carry me through this just as He has brought me through every other trial in my life.
Discovering God's will is tied in to being still. The Word says,
"Be still and know that I am God" Psalm 46:10 ESV.
When I forget that He is God or fail to act that way, I try to plow ahead doing whatever comes to mind. That makes matters worse.
When I embrace fully what my Sunday School teacher has been repeating lately, "He is God, and I am not," I can trust Him to lead me.
When going through hard times, being still before the Lord to discover His will can seem impossible. It's especially challenging when the enemy is bombarding my mind with thoughts that bring on moments or multiple moments of doubt, fear, and unbelief.
One of the reasons it can be rough discovering God's will in difficult times is that I ask myself, "How can this thing that's happening to me possibly be God's will?" and "How can a loving God allow this?"
The faith side of me says, "God does allow bad things, but He brings good out of them—if I submit to Him and trust Him with the outcome."
I confess that too often I try to stay in control and straighten out a difficult situation or a heart-tearing relationship conflict on my own. That doesn't work.
I notice when I try to do it on my own, love does not lead the way.
One thing I've become ever more certain of is this: "Love is always God's will and God's way." If I'm unwilling to love, this shows that I have not been fully set free. I'm moving back into bondage.
When I love even though others have hurt me, God is present and working. The other person may not change in every way I desire, but God changes my heart to become more like His. That's what trials are for—to transform me into the image of Christ. Changing me is God's will.
As I've been submitting to Him with an attitude of, "Lord, do what You need to do in me to make me more like You," the hardness in my heart is melting away. I'm embracing what Jesus said,
"Not my will, but Yours be done." Luke 22:42 ESV
There is great joy in discovering God's will. There is even greater joy when I'm willing to embrace it and live it. I'm excited to see what God has in store in the days, weeks, and months ahead. He is so good.
Have a great week guys.

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

The Hide Hide Culture

So last weekend, I attended a girls night bbq that was loads of fun. It was a mixed crowd of both American and Nigerian women. There was a group among the American women that happened to be close friends and they shared with us how they go on couples retreats and share stuff with each other. They shared some of the things with us that ranged from personal to sexual and one of them told us some of the things she didn't know and had learned just by talking to the women.

I thought about the night and I admired how open they were. I mentioned this fact to some of my friends there and also added that Nigerians would never do that. They disagreed with me and said it depends who it was and within their circle they would and they do. Unfortunately, I don't think I agree with them. I think it's just ingrained in us to just keep stuff hidden and put best foot forward. Hell, till today some of us still have that superstition of never giving out our travel dates even though we know better just because that's just how we are raised.

Thinking further, I wonder what is it we are so afraid of? You bring this up and the first thing Nigerians will tell you is that "something something trust" (I am guilty of that) but okay for some certain things though eg you have post partum depression and you share with someone, what is so terrible about people knowing that? Is the issue that we care so much about what people think? or we are in some subconscious competition and want to be better

This topic came about because I was reading about Hayden Pannettiere's struggle with post partum depression and it occured to me that I don't personally know any Nigerian who has been through it. I think of all the other things we go through as a nation but don't speak on it and end up feeling alone or less than because we aren't like everyone else. 

Oh well. just jumbled thoughts on a Tuesday night.

PS Meanwhile, I feel like I have been posting to empty halls. hellooooo? is anyone out there still reading?

Monday, October 5, 2015

What have you done?

I honestly try to think of things to blog about besides Friday Randoms but sometimes I think people don't want to read anything but Friday Randoms and people always tell me that noone has time to read anymore but oh well. I shall still try. In my trying, I thought of this blog post by Social Hermit where she made a list of 26 things she would like to do before she is 26. Granted, I am waaay older, I still think it is a fun list and a fun guide if you are looking for things to do or if you would like to enter the scary scary world that is adulthood. I will cross out the things that I have done. Okay here we go....


1.       Read the whole bible
2.      Take swimming lessons
3.      Take pole dancing classes
4.      Become proficient at yoga
5.      Visit 5 new states in the U.S.
6.      Go to a gun range
7.     Bake 2 cakes from scratch
8.     Go to at least 4 music concerts/festivals
9.     Go to one concert alone
10.  Start and grow an herb/vegetable garden
11.   Watch The Godfather trilogy
12.  Watch The note book
13.  Write 3 fiction pieces
14.  Have at least $3,000 in savings
15.   Read 15 books on my Nigerian literature list
16.  run a 5K (ok does walk/jog count?)
17.   Take a cooking class
18.  See a Broadway show
19.  Complete project 333
20. Make 3 original dishes
21.  Take a bubble bath – wine, candles, book etc
22. Vacation on an island (is riviera maya an island?)
23. Host a game night
24. Read 4 non-fiction books
25.  Visit a new country in Europe
26. Visit the grand canyon
I'd like to know what you have done or what you hope to do. Have a great week ahead people.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Friday Randoms

It's funny how your mood can change in an instant. I am currently in a bad mood. I am tired from working on something that took forever. I wasn't going to random but I actually do have randoms this week and I figured I might as well do it.

At the Emmy's Lisa Cholodenko won an Emmy and the announcer pronounced it with such ease. If that was an African name it would have for sure been butchered. So is it really pronunciation that's difficult or the origin of the name?

You might have caught wind of the whole brouhaha about Will's Smith's accent as a Nigerian man in the new movie "Concussion". A friend of mine thinks it's not a big deal. I think it is because we allow these things slide. When a movie star wants to portray an Australian they don't just wing it and give us a Brit accent hoping it will slide. There seems to be one universal African accent that sounds like it's from Eastern or Southern Africa. It'll be nice if effort was made to make it sound at least close to the real thing.

This whole voltroning for black nominees at award shows to win just because they are black, needs to stop. I am really not sure how we are "winning" if the win is because they are black vs. their talent.

I will never understand when people say "I am bored" when they live in America. There's so much to do!

I love cards. I save them too. I have a shoebox where I keep all my cards from yonder. Part of adulting is the dwindling number of cards you get as you get older. I only got one this year :(

Don't you guys think Trevor Noah and The Weeknd look alike? I know the dada is blocking the view but I promise they look alike.

Life can be a lot sometimes. Sometimes, I wish I could be more open and share on the blog but unfortunately I cannot forget that the internet is not a safe space.

People who don't have HIV but marry HIV positive people are heroes.

If any of you watch The League. It's about a group of friends who play fantasy football. In the group of friends is Andre. He is the bottom of the pole. Not that they don't love him but he is the one they pick on, laugh at behind and to his face but I can't even tell if he knows or not. Even if he knows he's just so glad to be in a group of friends I think he lets it slide. This had me thinking whether one would know if they were the "bottom of the pole" in their group of friends. It's a slippery slope because again it's not that they aren't there for him but he's still the butt of most of their jokes.

Someone once told me that they believe that if you want something so bad that you will get it. I don't believe in that theory. I believe life deals you cards and you just make best of what you are dealt. An example is I know of people who want kids so badly and have been praying for one for so long, if it was dependent on the desire they would have had dozens of kids by now abi?

As an adult grief is difficult enough. I can't imagine how a child processes that emotion. I watch kids who are so close to their parents like my boss's only child who calls her so many times a day or like Kroy (Kim from RHOA's husband) their 2 yr old son just thinks Kroy walks on water and does everything he does. Imagine telling him his dad passed away at that young and age, how do you make sense of whatever it is they feel considering they arent developed?

That's all I have. Hope you all have a great weekend.


Thursday, September 24, 2015

Friday [Guest] Randoms

Gosh this week has been a long week and I am so ready for Friday especially since I am doing absolutely nada this weekend. Except going to the dentist. I told a friend that I'd rather go to the dentist than the doctor and she thought that was weird. I have no anxiety going to dentists. Or maybe I got spoiled by my fabulous dentist in Dallas. Anyways as the title suggests, today's randoms are a guest random by my friend Swanboy. Every now and then, when I don't post randoms, he will hit me up to let me know that randoms aren't up and as is my reflex answer whenever I am hit up about randoms I let him know that he is welcome to guest random - and this applies to all of you. Anyone who would like to guest random, please feel free o. Hit me up and we will make it happen. So anyways, here are his randoms:

I got to observe three female friends of mine who are heavily pregnant. Ladies, standing ovation to you. One of my male friends who is married to one of them said he’d rather be childless than go through what women go through to give birth. No seriously, mo gbedi fun yin! I salute you.

Apparently, “man buns” are now in. Here it is for those who don’t know what I mean.  http://www.vox.com/2015/9/22/9370895/man-buns  . I saw a male coworker wear one some months ago. I honestly thought dude decided to become a Samurai. Had no idea it was fashion.

I have seen too many good things happen to bad people and vice-versa to believe in Karma. Sometimes life just happens, we get dealt the cards we are dealt. All we can do is pray God gives us the ability to deal.

In that same vein, I really get mad when people say “it’s part of God’s plan” when bad or tragic stuff happens. I’m a believing Christian, but I will never understand how  people, especially good people, going through pain and loss, is an avenue to attain some godly master plan. The Jewish character Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof said “God, I know we are the chosen people, but once in a while, could you please choose someone else?”

Oil prices are the lowest they’ve been in recent history. Gas is less than $2 a gallon in some places. Why are airlines still charging an arm, a leg and the soul of your firstborn for flights biko?

Oh and if anyone is traveling to Nigeria for the holidays, please bring me back a bottle of groundnuts. I would be eternally in your debt.  

When did doctors in US hospitals stop wearing their white coats? You go to a hospital now and can’t identify who a doctor is. Everyone is in scrubs. Even the janitor is in scrubs.

Children of God, remove anyone or anything that stands in the way of peace from your life. Life is too short to let anyone, no matter how related come between you and peace of mind. This is a lesson many Nigerians need to learn. Oyibo people have mostly perfected the ability to excise peace-stealers from their lives. The first time I heard an American man say that he has not spoken to his mother in almost 20 years, I was shocked. Now I get.

It’s amazing how much information you can get at work by simply sitting quietly in a locked toilet stall in the men’s restroom.

When you think of a good, witty comeback to something someone said, weeks after they said it. Sigh…

It is 2015 and there are some Nigerian men who still think that women are not naturally as horny, or as sexually promiscuous as men. SMH. Heard someone say that the ONLY reason a woman would cheat is if her husband or S.O. isn’t “handling business at home”. Sigh... Yimu.com. E go do am like feem.

For Nigerians who move to America, marry, have kids and live here, are the kids Nigerian-American or African-American? At what stage do Americans of Nigerian heritage become African-Americans?

Speaking of which, Nigerians that understandably come here to born pikin for the sake of American kpali, then go back. Just pray a Republican doesn’t get elected President. Otherwise izzalova Jackie, don cry, don beg.

You call customer service. The automated system asks for your information. You give it. Repeatedly.  You later get transferred to a live person who proceeds to ask you for the same information you spent the last 5 minutes of your lifespan giving to the automated system. This is why some people out of frustration join ISIS.

Saw this quote, I liked it. "Give someone strength when they have none, and maybe one day they will give it back to you when you are weak" 

That's about it folks, have a wonderful weekend.




Thursday, September 17, 2015

Friday Randoms

And just like that it is Friday again. I shouldn't be surprised especially since we are in the -mber months that have a reputation for practically flying us into christmas. Truly grateful the weather is still nice even though I think it's like one last hurrah before the cold aka fall befalls us. Thank you, you kind citizens for all the birthday wishes. I truly appreciate it. I had a great time. I went to Toronto and attended the Toronto Film Festival and it was so up my alley and so fun and my icing was my brother being in town. A few of my friends are coming into town this weekend so the celebration continues. Once again we thank God for another year. Let us random, shall we.

I think I may have mentioned how I watch "Bachelor in Paradise" and how I feel like it mirrors how things are in real life between men and women. In one case, this couple was one of the established couples in the house. Guy and girl was on same page - seemingly. He was going along with everything, saying the right things and girl was giddy and so secure. Next thing we see a side by side of the girl with her girls gushing and the guy saying he is unsure and his feelings aren't there and he tells us that he has "that feeling where you are lying with someone yet you feel alone" chei my peoples. That entered deeply. What is even life? A pot of beans that's what.

Someone asked me this: Would you rather watch a one hour movie of your best memories or a 5 minute trailer of your future? ( I chose memories)

Thinking of this question made me realize that I don't believe you can change your future. I think there are different paths to something but our destination is already predetermined. I'd like to hear your thoughts.

Watching a pro football athlete learn he has cancer let's me know that cancer is no respecter of anyone and honestly you can reduce chances but if a man who is of peak athleticism and works out like crazy, gets it. What chances do we mere people have?

"How's work?" "What's up with you?" "how was your night?" (err i slept) How are you supposed to answer these questions. Death to small talk!!!

I don't believe karma exists. I was thinking of Dr Dre and how he abused these women and he is flourishing out here with more money than I will ever see in this life, celebrated movie and career while Me'chelle is languishing in reality tv purgatory and fighting off depression and being suicidal. I know i know, you karma believers are gonna tell me you don't know where it hits them. Meh.

I was told about someone who had a mental disorder and died from a drug overdose. He also was a church goer and always used to give to the needy. How are people with mental disorders judged by God seeing as they have no control over their mental faculties?

How do you define a hoe? I heard a funny definition this weekend.

How long should one hold on to a dream? When do you give up? I have also noticed that people who give this "never give up" speech are usually kinda still young (and as i typed this I am recalling examples of older people realizing dreams on reality tv, so I am probably wrong there)

I dislike the logic of having more than one kid or x number of kids "in case something happens to one". One, there's no rule that kids die in 1's. Two, why is the worstest case scenario the reason to decide on number of kids and three, the statement makes it seem like the death of one kid is suddenly eased by the presence of another but it doesn't work that way because grief is a strange thing. You see parents who are so consumed by the death of one child there's no time for the rest. Yes, I can see the logic of having kids to keep you company or to be there for you but overall it's just a weird reason to me. I used to have it when I was younger. My reason for wanting more than one kid is just for them to have built in allies in their siblings.

I've read a number of books by British authors and why oh why do the insist on making British heroines stupid? They never have their lives together and are always so sniffelly and useless, really.

Before I leave you, I share with you what I was told. Whenever you make goals, make specific goals. A lot of us tend to make broad goals which allows for it not to be met but specific goals gives you direction on what and how to work for it.

Well, that's all I've got for you guys. Have a wonderful weekend. Stay blessed and support my sister site. You can also subscribe here. look for the subscribe button on the right and voila!






Thursday, September 10, 2015

+1

Another year, Another birthday.

I tried remembering how many +1 posts I have done. I am grateful for every time I get to see another year and I am a big birthday person but as you guys know this one was different. It was the first one without mom and I think I had some anxiety leading up to it not sure how or what I was going to feel today. I went to do my usual midnight prayers and it suddenly hit me. Midnight was when she would usually call me and sing happy birthday to me and the realization that "Mom" wouldn't be flashing on my phone screen got so overwhelming and I switched off my phone and sobbed my eyes out to the point where my eyes and head hurt. I read my bible and it was actually a chapter about strength and drawing strength from God. I wiped my eyes and went to sleep.

I woke up okay, getting ready for work and truly grateful for another year. Work was okay and some of my coworkers took me to lunch and the chef was kind enough to give me some type of birthday dessert with a candle and all. I am currently supposed to be on a plane headed somewhere but at 2pm I got a text from the airline saying that my flight was cancelled due to weather. I tried calling and they said call volume was too high, wait time was like an hour some and hung up. So I got into my car and headed on down to the airport. I managed to get a flight rescheduled and fingers crossed it works out.

I knew I had grown when in all this I was still laughing and smiling and just going with it without frustration and banging my head on the wall. Sometimes you just learn that things work out as they should.

So on this anniversary on the day of taynement, I thank God for a new year. I thank God for my thoughtful coworkers, my wonderful friends who called, messaged and checked in, the kind people on social media who I don't know personally but still wished me a happy birthday. I hope God continues to teach me lessons and I actually learn them. I hope he is always by my side and sees me through my good and bad times. I hope to be a better person and I wish myself nothing but blessings and grace in my life. Thank you God.

Happy birthday to me.

Thursday, September 3, 2015

Friday Randoms

I am so glad the long week is over and Friday is here and also that it is a long weekend. I am hella tired and so glad I am sitting my ass home for once, even if I am on the move again next week. Long way of saying Cheers to the long weekend! Did you guys watch the highly boring VMAs? How did that show go to shit? Kanye was really the highlight. That guy is off his rockers. I have no gist to share with you guys so I will just go right ahead and dive into randoms.

If you don't have weight issues, you should thank your lucky stars. Being disciplined and sticking to this health/fitness thing is not easy at all.

My newly married friend was yarning me about guilt free sex and it had me wondering how that works. Say you have been dating for years and been pre-maritaling all this time. Do you get married and suddenly your pre-marital sin debt is wiped away? What if you die the day after your wedding? Are you free of that sin?

Do you think that watching porn while married is a sin? (I think it is). Also, some people think that certain sexual acts are sinful even if you are married. If you are one of those, please feel free to share which you think it is. I know some people still think oral or anal even with a spouse is a sin.

Do you guys think there is such a thing as being addicted to sadness? Like there are people who enjoy being sad? Also, sometimes I think people who have seemingly/relatively good lives feel guilty and try to make up things to feel among or relate? Maybe I am alone on this.

Speaking of relating, I know sometimes people don't know what to say in certain situations but it's irksome when people give examples that aren't even on the same scale. Americans are guilty of this a lot. I give example. Met this lady not long ago and told her I am not from here and just moved and she goes oh me too, I moved also. I am like oh really? nice, how long ago? and she says 12 years ago. errr :/

Listening to a speaker at a meeting and as I am watching her, all I could think was how she looked (or was shaped) like a young boy and it made me appreciate how variety is so nice and essential because as I am wondering how someone would like that, there are a bajillion people who would find her uber attractive. Same for myself, one person might think I have too much meat on my bones and another will think I am the best thing since sliced bread. Isn't life grand?

The pain is real guys. I am really not sure how people go through this twice.

I enjoy volunteering and try to do it as often as I can. I did recently and while I was doing it I had the thought that this is probably what I'd like to do when I retire and have too much time on my hands. We really should be grateful for what we have in our lives. People have it hard. Noone should be begging for something as basic as milk, really. Noone. May I also use this platform to give you a nudge or push if you can donate anything to any food bank close to you or even clothes. Please do so. There is a great need out there. Ok, I am done.

*back to regularly scheduled programming*

Twitter is the one place where people who haven't experienced something will be the loudest ones telling you what to do most notably men telling women how to act or feel "in their experience", please what experience? as a woman??

It's also the place where everyone is an expert on all topics even the things they otherwise wouldn't have glanced at if not for twitter. It's sha a fun space to be in.

It takes a lot for me to open up and share certain things about myself. When i do and don't get the response I'd like, I clam up.

I clam up very easily. It's just the easiest thing for me to do.

You know, some spirits just don't gel. And this applies to romantic or just platonic regular friendships. Never try to force something that don't fit.

When men wear their badges on their belt loop, they know where the eyes are drawn to, right?

Speaking of the direction the eyes are drawn to, when I see men in flat front pants or any pants really with no bulge, I always do a mental "hmm..."

Wine should be an essential on a grocery list.

You know how Nigerians like to think they are modern and stuff, sometimes I think we are gonna be the way we are for a long time. I never really understood the 9 day rule that Yorubas observe when they have a baby where the name isn't revealed. I've always wondered why people of our generation observe it. Someone recently told me the reason why when I asked - even though I think they got defensive despite the fact I didn't even say anything but basically the answer included it being just a tradition and since they don't mind it, why not? I think a lot of traditions will be carried down for this reason and the saying "the more things change, the more things stay the same" will apply.

As I was asked earlier in the week "Do you have a "one that got away?" (Nah, i don't. I did a mental stock in my head and I swear I have dated crappy people. They can only go away quite far on a jet plane. thank you very much)

Please support my sister site www.taynement.com.

Have a great weekend, be safe and have fun.








Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Do you remember?

I watch this show called Marriage Bootcamp on WE. It's a marriage/relationship bootcamp for reality stars. It's run by a married couple who are marriage counselors and they put the couples through many exercises to help them dig deep and communicate and try to solve the issues with their partners.

In one of the exercises, each person was asked if they remember a single event in their lives that shaped who they are and how they are in past and present relationships.

I thought that that was a very deep question and proceeded to ask a bunch of people I knew (and learned that people either don't like being asked deep questions or don't like digging deep into their lives). A lot of people told me that they couldn't think of one single event, which is fair. Some examples from the show were the death of a mom that caused him to feel guilt and made him shut down and now he tends to notice he shuts down a lot in relationships, someone had a mom break trophies she had earned in anger and she remembered seeing her as the enemy and she tends to look at her boyfriends as the enemy and if her mom could do that to her, what guarantee is there that they won't so she is guarded and feels unlovable.

And so I pose the question to you: Can you think of a single event that has shaped who you are and manifests itself in how you behave in relationships?

Thursday, August 13, 2015

Friday Randoms

I am lying here with a heated something something on my back cuz I  think I may have tweaked something. Old age is really real. The current weather is something that makes me smile inside. I am really going to miss the summer. I think everytime everyone says that life is short but I really don't think it resonates until it hits close, then we forget and go back to daily living till the next time but for real for real guys - life.is.short. Don't take it for granted that you wake up everyday like clockwork. life changes in the blink of an eye. Okay, enough bleak talk, thank you again for the interest you guys showed in the "Love or Something Like It series. I'd also like to say thank you to the contributor. Couldn't have been an easy thing to share that personal story. Okay let's random.

Why is it that when I get all dolled up, I look in the mirror, I see babe then I take a picture and I see dinosaur...why sway???!!

American kids ehn. They are spoiled. One of the ogas at work surprised her daughter for her birthday with 4 tickets to Maroon 5 and Nick Jonas concert on the beach and this babe said nah, she's not interested. Honestly, if I were the mother, I won't even tell the story, I go shame. I thought it was so selfish. Like if your mom did that for you, just for the thought you say thank you and "endure". Her loss though, I copped myself some tix.

I know this is mean but there are some people you observe that carry skinniness on their head and act like fat people aren't humans. You just wish them nothing but fatness.

Sometimes I catch myself in an argument with people about things I have seen with my own eyes in Nigeria. I think it's a bit ridiculous especially when these people haven't been home in a while and get all their info from social media and bella naija and the likes. Like why am I even wasting my time?

It really is a strange concept that we will all be dead someday.

Once you find someone annoying everything they do is annoying even if it's the way they blink.

Where do you draw the line between respecting a friend as an adult and letting them be vs. recognizing someone is your friend and calling them out on stuff when need be.

There are some people who feel some type of way about paying someone to clean their houses/apartments (common among Nigerians). Not I, sir. It's the bestest thing ever.

Why do Nigerians get so uppity about people who like well done steak. Live and let live. If it was so wrong, it wouldn't be an option at restaurants.

If you are cool with someone, like you get along well and no beef, but they consider you more of a friend than you do them, are you friends? How do you define a friend? In your everyday life do you label some people as acquaintances or do you just call everyone friend, whether loosely or not?

So you know the Christian argument about not messing with your body e.g no tattoos and how everything on your body was given to you by God. Also, every body part is supposed to have a purpose, yea? So is circumcision a sin? What is the purpose of a foreskin? protection?

Is it possible to be an alcoholic if you are addicted to just wine? I never really consider wine as alcohol but it is. Would I take it seriously if someone was an addict because they were addicted to Smirnoff Ice? I mean, it has alcohol, right?

I was thinking the other day. I always pray to God to take control when it comes to choosing a life partner for me and we all know he has a sense of humor. What if he sends me someone who wants to wait till marriage? As a struggling Christian trying to get right, this should make me happy but my fellow brethren, my heart sank a little.

I think a true measure of where you stand in your faith is how you feel about your death/rapture. If you are happy for it and can't wait then you good, fam. If the thought of it fills you with terror, then...get on right with the Lord yo.

Okay that's all I have for you guys. Have a lovely weekend. Stay safe and stay prayed up.


Thursday, July 30, 2015

Friday Randoms

Hello all. Hope you are all doing well. I really love summer. I never understand when people complain about the heat. I'd take this all day vs. the winter or fall. I really hate wearing coats and sweaters. Can you believe we have just 5 months left of this year? It feels like January was just here. Personally, it's just been a long ass year but this isn't about me. Let's random.

How are celebs able to rebound from relationships so quickly? Like it doesn't matter the age, circumstance or look you are guaranteed to hear of their new relationship almost immediately after a split. Thinking about it, it's just not reserved for celebs sha. There are people who are almost rarely single. They always have a significant other. How do you guys do it o?

How do you kick a person out your system?

How many of your friends were made online vs. physically in real life? Was talking to a friend who mentioned how he met his friend via some msn community thingie and it had me remembering a convo with another friend who said he thought most of my bridal party would be friends I made online (not even sure why he thought that). I thought about it and while I have made a lot of friends via online mediums, none of the people I have in mind for my bridal party right now (except 1, which is even a comma whether she's online) would be from online and most of my close friends are friends I made in college.

Those of you that have hope for Nigeria, where do you get it from? This is a serious question btw.

It's a bit awkward being friends with 2 people who were dating and are now split.

Why do celebs retweet their compliments? Don't they get enough attention? I noticed this is a common practice among reality stars sha, so that makes sense.

I envy people who are always on some "life is great" tip because I don't care if you positive patrolers come to get me but LIFE IS HARD. All the decisions, responsibilities and curve balls you have to deal with and navigate while preserving your sanity. It's hard biko.

I thought this was a really good read pertaining to life http://markmanson.net/question

Nigerians can be so extra about stuff. When they do stuff you'd think they've never done it before. Like they've never seen champagne before or traveled abroad or *insert any cool kid activity*. just be making noise about it up and dahn.

You can try to edit yourself taya to make people more comfortable around you but honestly, you can please everyone. Something will always still be an issue. Guess it is better to just be you. Noone is obligated to hang out with you or be your friend.

That's all I have for you guys. Have a great weekend. Be safe and stay prayed up.






Sunday, July 26, 2015

12 Steps to Self Care

I come across a lot of these things online and once upon a time I'd view them as cliches and roll my eyes but as I get older I have realized that these reminders are so necessary because once again, we know better but we don't do better.

1. If it feels wrong, don't do it

2.  Say [exactly] what you mean

3.  Don't be a people pleaser

4.  Trust your instincts

5.  Never speak bad about yourself

6.  Never give up on your dreams

7.  Don't be afraid to say no

8.  Don't be afraid to say yes

9.  Be kind to yourself

10. Let go of what you can't control

11. Stay away from drama and negativity

12. LOVE

Hope you found at least one thing that resonates? Which ones resonated with you? Have a lovely week ahead.

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Friday Randoms

Hi all. Hope everyone had a good week. We are having a lot of thunderstorms here and it's kind of annoying just rain all the time. I don't think I got to say this but thank you to everyone who left a kind message or sent an email to me about my mom. I appreciate it and thank you for the prayers, they are much needed and truly appreciated. Regarding my last post about nature vs. nurture, I read this article last week about two sets of twins switched in error - http://www.nytimes.com/2015/07/12/magazine/the-mixed-up-brothers-of-bogota.html?_r=1 - it was such a fascinating read and also mentioned in there was: One unexpected finding in his research suggested that the effect of a pair’s shared environment — say, their parents — had little bearing on personality. Genes and unique experiences — a semester abroad, an important friend — were more influential. Pretty fascinating. Anyways here are my randoms:

I have finally decided that I don't like it when an older woman dates a much younger man. More oft than not, she is gonna want stuff that he is not ready to give and it's kinda like what's the point?

Honestly, celebs living in their own world is a thing because they never seem to learn. I am totally not against Russell and Ciara being celibate not at all but why announce it? Someone responded to me that it gives inspiration for those practicing same which I kinda see but biko they are celebs. I can give you a long list of celebs who declared same and didn't follow through. I feel like Russell has invited a whole slew of people into their relationship, things always get blown out of proportion when you are a celeb. Also, the whole God told me to lead her etc rubbed me the wrong way. Breh, you just got a divorce, we are all sinners and learning.

I don't think it's harder to make friends as you get older, I think it's harder to find people you click with especially because your tolerance for bullshit is at a low.

Technology advancement is a bit scary. I look at some of the things we can do now and I am just like can we slow down?

If you watch Married to Medicine, you know Dr Jackie is constantly on some be skinny under the guise of be healthy tip and she borders on rudeness. One of the doctors made a comment that it's interesting hearing Dr Jackie make these comments when she has never had to struggle with her weight before and I think he had a point. Sometimes it's amusing seeing people who never had to struggle give all these tips like it's easy but if you have never had to struggle you get to have your cheat days and gorge on fattening foods and skip workouts and still be skinny where someone who struggles has to do twice the work. Long and short sha, sometimes some sensitivity is lacking.

Has anyone ever read an obituary that was honest? Every obituary seems to make the dead person a paragon of virtue of human being-hood. You aren't supposed to speak ill of the dead but is it ill if it's truth?

I listened to a podcast that made me think of people who reside in troubled countries. I honestly can't imagine what it would be like to live in a place where you are in fear 24/7.

I am always fascinated by people with pseudo or full on igbo accents who can't speak the language. One of my closest friends today, the day I met her and she said she couldn't speak I was all "who are you fronting for?". yes i am a mess.

I don't know if I will ever delete my mom from my bbm or my contacts. I miss her everyday.

Once again, always believe that the way you see yourself is definitely not how people see you.

Social Media is not a true representation of how people are really doing. People always make that mistake.

In today's episode of Taynement's irrational irks. I dislike when I am having a conversation with someone and they just start dropping links. I totally get why, to back up a point but I work in research and know that you can skew anything to back up whatever point you want to. Kinda like how you can find any bible passage for whatever you want to prove. But I'd just rather have a discussion that having to take a break and go read then come back. Remember i said it was irrational. Thanks.

Guys, self delusion is the way to go. If you truly believe you are the shit, nothing can phase you and you believe your hype. I know people who operate this way and it's totally working for them. So people, get your dose of self delusion today!

Have a wonderful week guys. Stay prayed up and be safe.

I love this song.










Sunday, July 5, 2015

Nature vs. Nurture

The other day I came across this tweet on my TL:

"i sometimes feel like the children of single parent homes or of divorce will stay in relationships LONG past the sell by date..."

I found this tweet silly because it reminded me of many sayings like this that I have heard in the past that seem to imply certain behaviors are solely or majorly found in people from single parent or divorced homes without recognizing that there are many scarred people that come from 2 parent/stayed together parents. Just because it's a 2 parent home doesn't mean it was rosy but anyways that's not my point. It led me to thinking whether people's lives/characteristics is because of their environment or their natural traits.

The age old Nature vs. Nurture question.

I still don't know where I stand on this question, but I think if I had to pick I'd pick Nature.

I think we are born with certain characteristics at birth that guide us through our decisions in life. Sure along the way, our experiences alter/modify, but I don't think the core of a person can be changed? or can it?

Another reason for those who might pick nurture. I met a couple. Married 50 years, been together about 54 years. They are a joy to be around. Still laugh together, hold hands etc. I asked what they thought was most important and he said she makes him laugh everyday. So basically, the epitome of a happy marriage. Now switch to their kids. A different story. I think except for one, none stayed married. Made bad dating decisions, single mom, problems with kids etc. They had an exemplary marriage to look up to so why?

I can recognize if people think I am making it simplistic with this example but i'd like to hear your thoughts. What do you think? What do you think has more influence in a person's life?

Nature vs. Nurture?

Thursday, June 25, 2015

An Irish Prayer

It's been a rough couple of months since I lost my mom. Sometimes, I look at myself and wonder how I am functioning. If you had ever told me how I would be if I ever lost my mom I would have told you I would have lost it, but here we are. Grief is a very strange thing. It's also a very confusing thing. You are full of questions but have no answers and won't get any because they are gone. It brings many different emotions that hit you at the weirdest times.

Every little thing reminds me of my mom and I can think of a memory to attach to it. It's an odd thing continuing and acting like life goes on when your world has stopped. Sometimes, I feel like a crazy person. After the funeral it was much worse. I felt so lost (I still do). I felt like I was walking around with a gaping hole. I was so confused and I didn't know what the purpose of life or God was. I couldn't pray. I tried reading the bible but everytime I read something that alluded to God protects his own or is always there, I'd shut down cuz all my mind told me was "LIES!!!".I felt like God abandoned me.

I found that people don't know what to say. I also found that as much empathy one may have, if they haven't lost a parent they didn't understand. You hear so many things - some insensitive, some that made me wonder "did they just say that?" and you have to understand they don't understand. I turned to friends, especially those who had lost a parent(or both), they understood me more and I was so desperate to find out how they survived this "trauma"(that's what I call it) because it just looked so bleak to me.

The funny part was as mad as I was at God, I had no other better solution. I somehow found my way back to prayer and I have to say it helped some. As I am talking to God and telling him to for once listen to me, I am also telling him I don't even know why I am praying to him but somehow I always end up having that need to pray (contradictory, right?). A friend of mine took it upon herself and gave me a stern, long talking to and it stuck. She explained her emotions when she lost her dad, how she still felt his presence, she called and prayed with me and for me, gave me perspective , listened to me whenever my anxiety crept up (which is often, i tell ya) and she got me a journal to write in because she said writing helps.

I think I am doing better now but I know I will never be the same. I am taking each day as it comes and it takes a conscious effort to get through each day with that ache. Thinking of the things I will never share with my mom again. I am not rushing myself or giving myself a time frame, I am allowing myself to grieve and mourn my mom. I don't know how long it will take but I am also just trying to have a better mindset of life. Life is indeed short. I still am not able to go to church ( I went once and it overwhelmed me, it felt like being in a building that betrayed me). So, I stick to mediating with God at home till I am ready.

I hope I continue to get better with each passing day and I intend to make my mom proud by bettering myself overall. Yesterday a friend of mine sent me this Irish prayer and I think it fits with where I want my mindset to be:

May God give you...
For every storm, a rainbow
For every tear, a smile
For every care, a promise
And a blessing in each trial.

For every problem life sends, 
A faithful friend to share,
For every sigh, a sweet song
And an answer for each prayer.

Have a lovely weekend. Stay prayed up and be safe.

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Friday Randoms

Today is a somber day in America. These occurrences against black people is getting too frequent and it's actually a bit frightening because really this could happen to any one of us. May the souls of all those lost rest in peace. Here we go with randoms dedicated to my friend, Swanboy.


What's the line between confidence and arrogance?

Pet Peeve: When people sound so sure about stuff they have no proof or know nothing about. It is quite common among Nigerians because for some reason saying "I don't know" is a crime.

Sometimes I think my being single bothers other people more than me myself.

I can't count the number of times I have been asked if I will do online dating. I don't know what the intentions or reasons are but I always side eye the question. Especially if I haven't complained to said person about not meeting people. I just find it annoying when people have some insight into my love life or lack thereof.

Speaking of love life, it's one thing to be private but it's a whole other thing to be in a relationship or quarter to engaged and be fellowshipping with single people about "our own time will come"

I know there are some people who suddenly have all the wisdom once they get married. I don't think anyone should expect to be cheated on. Not at all. That's unhealthy. At the same time, I don't think anyone is beyond being cheated on.

I had never been to a funeral before. For my first funeral to be my mom's, it was as awful or far worse than I expected it to be. I don't see how anyone's life can be the same after you have seen a loved one in a casket. Hands down the hardest thing I have ever had to experience.

Where do you consider home? Where the heart is? Where you feel at peace? *insert whatever else definition*. I don't know where I consider home. I have no ties to anywhere.

Sometimes, as human beings, we bring things upon ourselves - I call them man made problems. I don't consider it a situation where God is testing you or your faith. For example, if you lay with a person unprotected and you catch something. The rough patch you go through isn't a test. It's the consequence of a mistake. Mistakes are things we humans do a lot because we are...human. Now how we react and deal with the consequence whole different matter but before then, no need to bring the big man into something that we brought upon ourselves.

When a woman loses her husband, she's a widow. When a husband loses his wife, he is a widower. When children lose their parents they are orphans. What do you call someone who loses a child?

If you have a child and name them and you lose that child. Is it weird to name a future child the same name as the one you lost?

People underestimate the fear I have for doctors/hospitals/offices. Was at the doctor's office earlier and while waiting I nearly passed out from fear. By the time the doctor walked in I was trying to breathe and trying to loosen my loose shirt collar as if I was wearing a tie (dramatic much). She was like are you okay? Glad she was a nice doc sha, she knows my history and said I have ptsd from previous experiences. She also told me to maybe try hypnosis (hardy ha ha)

I really don't like "lol" as a filler in convos. I get that sometimes it's the only thing to say, I am guilty of it but when it's used every other message, it's like grrr.

Someone once asked if graveyards at some point cleared out the graves and headstones and if they didn't wouldn't we run out of space at some point. I thought that was a good point. I walked by a graveyard today and I saw a bunch of headstones of people born in the 1800's!! and died in like 1920's. I wonder if people still visit. Is it a leased space?

Guys please help a sister out and visit www.taynement.com and tell a friend to tell a friend. Thank you!

Hope you guys have a wonderful weekend. Remember to always stay prayed up and be safe.






Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Favour

I saw this tweet on my TL:

"Things people are struggling for, you get them easily without sweat. Without compromise. Just God's favour!"

I think I may have said this in my randoms before but this tweet reminded me how the word favor rubs me off the wrong way. I totally get wanting to sing your blessings to the world but I truly think there are other ways to do so without being smug? obnoxious? (are those the right words?)

We are told that God loves us all equally but when these self proclaimed favored people make these declarations, the word seems to take on a connotation like they are on a different level and are better in God's eyes. Like those who don't get them easily (to quote the lady above) are doing bad things and deserve to be punished.

Once again, I am not saying the praises of God shouldn't be declared publicly but more oft than not these declarations often comes across as bragging under the guise of praising God. I think you can tell when a declaration is genuine, I doubt it would include comparison to others.

My gripe of the day.

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

The thing about religion...

I met someone this week who is Jewish. He was introduced to the religion by his wife. He believes in equality and social justices for all and actually does things about it to make it happen. He is all for gay rights. In his car, he keeps a basket of stuff that includes socks, gloves, hats, snacks, medicine, vitamins etc to give to homeless people he encounters that may be in need.

I also have a friend who is so generous with the kindest heart and is always looking out for the interest of everyone else before hers. In my time(s) of need, she has always shown up in a big way. She happens to be gay.

Based on the christian religion, these two people don't meet the criteria to make it into Heaven even though they are they epitome of loving their neighbors as they love themselves.

How sway?

Makes no sense to me.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Friday Randoms

Hi guys. The weekend is upon us again. There's no point counting down anyways because I feel like you blink and Friday is here. I mean we are almost done with the first quarter of the year, March will soon be over. I thought we were done with snow in these parts but of course not. We are expected to have snow tomorrow ironically the first day of Spring. Go figure.

This was a stressful week for me so I am kinda glad to see it almost over. Why does life have to be hard sometimes? Also why is it hard to walk away from something that is clearly not good for you? Anyone of you guys watch the Empire finale? It was such an acid trip. Everything and EVERYTHING was packed into those 2 hours. It was a hot mess but I loved it. Guess it makes sense why I love reality shows, huh? Okay let's random before I say what I am not supposed to say on here.

I am truly grateful for wine. I am currently sipping on some Berry White Cranberry something and the tart and sweet combination is making me feel nice. (says the girl with the alcohol tolerance of a 10 year old)

How are people on TV never freaked out by the disgusting bathrooms they seem to find themselves in (think of how disgusting the bathroom Olivia Pope was in was). They just casually stroll in and do what they need to do like the place isn't a germ trap.

I saw this quote "No one is successful because they are lucky" and I still don't know if I agree with it or not. What do you guys think?

I never understand when people refer to sleeping at like 7/8pm as napping. It's not a nap jo, it's sleep. Or is napping not restricted to a particular time of the day? I always thought it was a daytime thing.

I don't understand why working professionals can't get Spring Break. If children doing common school work need time off. How about us dealing with the stress of life and working 9-5 everyday with deadlines and stuff. A one week mental break would be awesome.

I really want to go on a European tour. I really just want to run away from my life. Anywhere might do.

When celebs die of an overdose and their fellow celeb friends start to commiserate and sing their praises, I often wonder if they knew that their friend had a drug problem and if they ever tried to help. They always seem to just speak about them like it wasn't an overdose.

When I meet old people that have never had cancer they are like wonders to me.

You know how people say if someone has a bad attitude like bitchy, crazy, unpleasant etc that it is harder for them to find a mate. I don't think I agree. I am watching Real World and this psychopath man with a terrible temper found himself a nice guy. You think about older naija couples where the dad is so chilled but the mom is like from a horror movie.

Every story that ends in a wedding is a successful story, eh? "I just knew she would be my wife/husband"

"Dating scares the crap out of everybody" Is that true? Aren't there people that love it? I have a friend on Tinder just for the fun of it.

I recently tried to read a physical book and it was so awkward. It was as hard as trying to text on a non smart phone. I actually never made it past the 3rd page. I will go back to it some day.

Well that's all I have for you guys. Work is about to send me on a flurry of travel so I am about to be acquainted with airports again. You guys have a great weekend and be safe.