Friday, December 13, 2013

Friday Randoms

Hi guys. How are you? Hope everyone's good and everyone's been keeping well and staying warm. Man, I gotta tell you this weather has not been kind to us. I live in Texas and contrary to popular belief it gets cold here. We were hit by an ice storm and I know people like to laugh at us but we were having highs in the 20's with ice everywhere and everything frozen. I am glad we are warming up now. I am watching the new Netflix documentary The Short Game as I type this. I love documentaries. (and man I watch too much tv) So cute watching little kids who have already found their passion and have discipline in training and are so ambitious. Oh yea and Beyonce just released a visual album at midnight. I learned that a visual album is one where every song on the album is accompanied by a video for each songs. The stans are going crazy. I previewed the videos and man, this girl's body is SICK. Whatsup with these chicks (kim K) looking better after having a baby. Anyways let me random:

There's a reason why it's easier and arguably better to just say fine when someone asks how you are. Whether or not you feel fine.

Man, Iyanla has seen some things in her life. divorce, death of a child, foreclosure etc etc

Speaking one point is it too much for a person to go through? If any of you are familiar with the TLC show The Little Couple about a married dwarf couple. First they wanted to have kids and she couldn't get pregnant. She is already dealing with the complications that come with being a dwarf. She finally got pregnant and she miscarried. Then after that she just found out she has a rare form of cancer. Granted the miscarriage might have saved her life but it just seems like so much for one person.

I now believe the whole concept of being "good"  equaling being rewarded with good things happening to you is hogwash.

After watching Time of Death, I just wonder now if there's more to the after life than just Heaven and hell. The concept of just that just seems so simplistic now.

-------This documentary is so good------

Speaking of Time of Death. It's this reality show about death on Showtime that follows people with terminal illnesses till the time of their death..and when I say the time of their death, I mean we watch them take their last breath. It's so hard to watch, watching people deteriorate and then die but it's also so good.

"When you identify with a belief/religion for so long, you feel threatened by a different view because there is a chance that you could be wrong and how can you be wrong?"

"Life is simple we just make it complicated" I don't agree with that anymore. I think we think of it from our own comfortable lives with average problems. If I spoke to a girl born into a war torn country, looking for food, who has been circumcised and sexually assaulted by family members or infected by a disease that is not a simple life. I think I identify more with Life can be simple. It can also be complicated.

Speaking of..."men are simple"...yea ok.

I told someone that I wouldn't have an abortion at this age like what would be the point? Got me thinking if there was an age limit for abortions?

Can you be with a virgin man? I keep wavering. As of now, no. Ok lemme say, depends what kind of virgin. If an overly religious, wound up man - no.

Does it mean anything or does it affect a marriage if your partner is not the best you've ever had?

Lol, I swear noone believes in lying to their partner for the sake of "maintaining" a relationship like Nigerians.

So don't judge me but when I see a couple where both people don't have papers, my first thought is like "what's the point?"

Genesis 3 has a verse where God banished the snake to the belly after giving Eve the apple. So then, if it was banished to his belly, how was it moving before then?

I wonder if Jordin Sparks still has her purity ring. I am rooting for her and Jason Derulo. I hope they last.

I commented on Mgbeks post about blaming yourself when things go sour in a relationship. I am so guilty of that. This year, I got 2 apologies from blast from the pasts saying it was not anything I did. Not to say that's the case every time but it helps.

Ok I think I may have flapped my gums too much. Today is my last official work day for the year 2013 and I am excited and ready to just relax. Just in case I don't get a chance to come back here, I hope you guys have a wonderful holiday and always remain blessed.

I love this song. The video always puts me in a good mood cuz everyone is dancing like noone is around. Hope you enjoy it too.

Friday, December 6, 2013


If you haven't watched Benedict Cumberbatch's version of Sherlock (PBS in America) I watched on Netflix. Then you are on a long thing. Ohhhhh soooo goood (It's the version CBS' Elementary is based on) I became a huge Benedict Cumberbatch fan after that. It is the only reason I endured the 5 part "Parade's End" miniseries, cuz Lord knows that thing was dreadful. Dude was in like 5 movies this year alone. Anyways, I digress. As a Cumberbitch (its the name we were given) I found this video hilarious and oh so hot. It's him reciting lyrics from "Genius", a song on R Kelly's upcoming album titled Black Panties". Enjoy.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Happy Thanksgiving

Hi guys! Finally, Thanksgiving is here. Thank you all for your well wishes and prayers from my last post. I appreciate you all. It's so cold here and yes, it does get cold in Texas. Apparently, some people are under the impression that it doesn't get cold here but it does o. The last few days have been high of like 35 degrees and feels like 27 but the good news is we get back to like 60's soon. Looking forward to that cuz my light bill is suffering. I actually don't know if I have done this before but this year I do want to have a thanksgiving post where I say all that I am thankful for, no matter how little or cliche.

I am thankful for the gift of life. I may not always say my prayers as often as I should but the one thing I always try to do every morning when I wake up is say "Thank you for letting me see another day". A lot of horrific things we see on the news or read about and we always think it happens to other people not us. Like I told a friend the other day when we were talking about the nigerian girl that got murdered, it could have been anyone of us. Someone like me that lives alone and walks into the apartment at different times. My health, may not be where I want it to be but I am thankful to God that I am still alive and still have a chance to keep fighting.

Thankful for my family. There's nothing like that comfort of knowing that no matter how much they annoy you, when push comes to shove these people have my back no matter what. I'm thankful for their lives. Exactly this time a year ago, we found out my mom and my aunt had been diagnosed with cancer. My mom's was caught early and she is in the clear now. You don't know how thankful I am for this. My aunt is still fighting but I am grateful she is still fighting. Way better than the alternative.

Thankful for my friends who have been there for me in various ways especially, these last few months that have been difficult. To those who listened to me cry, those who checked on me, those who helped out financially, those who made me laugh to keep my spirits up. Even if it may seem like I wasn't receptive, I was. I am forever grateful and appreciative of you all. Special shout out to my best friend who called me almost everyday just to make sure I was okay, find out what the doc said or even just to say hi. Thank you for that and for always knowing the right thing to say.

Thankful for a job that provides me a paycheck and an understanding boss and let me have all the time that I needed with the numerous doc appointments (My boss was actually the one who recommended my current doctor to me as a second opinion that turned out to be a better decision) A job that provides insurance for all these bills they like to dump on you. A job that makes me able to pay rent and pay my light bill because can you imagine being homeless in this weather?

Thankful for my growth as a human being this year. Still have a ways to go but lots of lessons learned this year and I think I got better at handling obstacles.

Thankful for TV and Music!!! I wasn't gonna forget those! I always joke that my TV is my faithful boyfriend. But yall know me. It was a good year for TV, whatever I could I watched them all. It made for random thoughts, conversation starters and stuff to blog about on Same goes for music. Endless driving with me singing at the top of my lungs makes for fond memories. Numerous concerts especially getting to see Abel again. Fun times.

Thankful for you all who still read my blog 6 years later. I have "met" and met some kind people through this blog and I am thankful for you all taking out the time to read, for those of you that comment and for those of you who visited the sister site and even contributed to Fan Friday (we are still accepting writeups o). Thank you all!

I can't think of anything else. I hope you all have a fantabulous Thanksgiving - well my yankee people. Eat, Drink, Be merry and hug your family one extra time. Stay warm and Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Random Thursday..or Friday?

Hi guys, I thought I had been out a while but I checked and its just been 2 weeks. Guess it just feels like longer. Like they say, a lot can happen in a short time. I had been dealing with some medical issues that left me in a lot of pain the last few months. Many doctor and hospital visits later, I finally had surgery last week. We thank God that it went well, as evidenced by me writing this. I am on the recovery train now and yesterday was my first good day and gave me hope so looking forward to the future and yay to no more pain. I have learned so much about people, life and myself these last few days. Thank you Baba God and even though my aunt will never read this, we have our many ups and downs but I really hope she knows how appreciative I am of all that she has been doing for me since I could barely move around. I also want to thank my friends who have been there the last few months listening to my complaints, offering to go on dr visits with me, praying and just being there for me. Thank you ever so much. This is beginning to sound like some award show, I realized I had some randoms so let me share with you, eh?

Why didn't anyone tell me about Graceland? The show has been on my dvr and I am really truly enjoying it. Yay to being up to 2 shows I now watch on USA.

I am not sure I can say this enough, but I truly believe that when a man wants you, you will know and I don't mean that in a sexual way. I mean when a guy wants to be committed to you.

I really like Meredith and Christina's relationship on Grey's Anatomy. They just get each other. They can depend on each other and don't tip toe around each other and speak the truth.

I read this article about a serial cheater. My only question is why does he feel the need to get married? Why embarrass his fiancee? Here's the article if you are interested -

I really truly enjoyed the TLC biopic. It was very well done.

Something I struggle with is always remembering that everyone doesn't think the same way I do and vice versa. I do a lot of deductive reasoning and sometimes expect everyone to do so, so when in convo I am asked certain questions, I am like huh?

"A friend loves at all times, a brother is born for a time of adversity" - Proverbs 17:17

I am one of those people that have a sense of urgency. I don't relate to people who wait last minute or are laid back about big events. I am that irritant that tries to plan and weigh pros/cons/efficiency.

"So many Nigerians operate under the flawed teaching that we are only doing well if we are doing better than someone else"

The missionary position gets a bad rap. I'm also pretty sure more people than would admit like it but don't want to be labeled boring.

That stunning ela when you realize you really aren't as important to someone as you thought you were. haha, my friend said this. Thought it was funny.

Masters of Sex, my new favorite show gave an analogy by a woman who had been having bad sex and discovered the joys of new sex. She said how her mom said it was lady like to have small feet and forced her to wear a size 6, until one day she wore her true size which was a size 8 and she never knew this comfort was even possible.

There was a time I truly believed most Nigerians were waiting till marriage lol. I remember when I was 13 and my "bf" asked me for some "fun". I was absolutely horrified! loool

The theory that squats increase butt size. I have never met anyone in real life that it has worked for. Made it firmer?yes but made it bigger? never seen

You know what I hate? That saying "It could be worse". I get the reasoning. But I feel, it dismisses or disregards the current emotion/feeling of the subject.

That being said our generation might be lacking the empathy gene.

Do you have a time limit on how long you must date a guy before you marry him? Used to be 4 years for me but now that I am an old woman I guess not so much.

That's all I got for you guys. Have a wonderful weekend guys. Thank God for each day you get to see a new day and tell your loved ones you love them.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Is your heart closed?

What's a conversation if men/relationships/marriage doesn't come up, eh?

Had the following convo with a (married) friend. To give a heads up, I had asked my twitter people if catholics could marry non catholics and vice versa. My friend in question is catholic and married a catholic. Ok here's the convo (snippet):

Her: Marriage is already hard enough to add a really deep factor and some people faith and church doesn't matter to them For me. It's number 1. That then everything else, cos a man centered around God is by default a good man. And the catholic faith is a tad different. I need us to be in sync.

Me:   I agree. Now let me find a man first before worrying about all that.

Her: A man will find you. Open your heart.

Me: Is it closed?

Her: You tell me. There is a true opening of heart. I can't explain it. But if you examine yourself you'll know.When you're solid in yourself. When you know what you truly want. When you are ready for God's gift. You'll get it. When you want something, you have to live your life according to that which you want. You can't want it and do everything contrary. 

Okay my lovelies, I won't taint this too much with plenty story. All I want to hear is what do you think? What are your thoughts as you read this?

Happy Halloween!

Thursday, October 17, 2013

What is the biggest lesson you have learned in Marriage?

I know I haven't had randoms in a while but men, life is on a long ting right now with me so my thoughts have been everywhere but not just here. I did have a random question I decided to take one step further. My title says it - What is the biggest lesson you have learned in marriage? I asked a whole bunch of my friends who are married. I should mention all the people I asked are in marriages that are less than 5 years old. The first 3 people I asked all said the same thing - "patience". So, ladies and gentlemen, find your patience! As impatient as I am, Lord knows I need his healing powers in this area. Anyways, below are the answers that I received. Hope you enjoy or find a nugget or two.

"As a newlywed, I would say being supportive and exhibiting being supportive is one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned from marriage thus far (closely following the need for an abundance of patience and the importance of communicating and solidifying unified ambitions).  Many times couples fail to be the cheerleader one another needs.  When I say cheerleader, I don’t mean the transient “you can do it!” and “go you!” but rather I mean demonstrating support by getting involved.  I find I have greater satisfaction in pursuing (and accomplishing) personal targets/goals when my husband takes an interest in them and participates in making sure they are realized. Likewise it is extremely disheartening when he fails to do so. He would certainly say the same from his perspective. Support, although seemingly trivial, is vital in cementing a sense of genuine partnership and love in a relationship"

"Till death do us part is a loooooooooooooooong contract"

"You are going to have to do a bunch shit that makes NO sense to you... but seem to matter a great deal to her"

"When she comes to me with a problem, she is rarely ever looking for a solution. Instead she is looking for pampering. That is one of the hardest things to have to adapt to"

"You can think it, but you don't have to speak it. Holding your tongue is way more important than honesty"

"Press reset and pick your battles. Leave hurts, anger etc behind and start each day like the day you got married"

"I can finally understand why people get divorced. Marriage is and can be sweet but there are times that you're like wtf is this and if you don't marry your friend, you're screwed"

"Choosing your battles and understanding that no one is perfect, including me"

"Don't do it"

"Start the way you want to finish and don't lose your identity"

"Keep my mouth shut"

"When we are wrong we say I'm sorry. It clears the air so fast and restores peace. We say thank you a lot for the big and small things, makes each person feel appreciated"

Okay I think these are all the quotes. I collected all these a while ago and just didn't post. Anyways, have any faves? Married folk please feel free to add any in the comment section. Have a wonderful weekend guys!

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Fan Friday

Hi guys, I know I have begged before and I am begging again. I have a segment on my sister site ( called Fan Friday where anyone gets an opportunity to rave about any pop culture topic that they are passionate about. I received some entries and thank you to all who sent in, I truly appreciate it. BUt I need more:(. Please let me know if you have a submission or you can email me at

Below is a link that explains the rules for the write up:

Let me know if you have any questions and you can have more than one entry. Hope to hear from some of you guys soon! Have a lovely day!

Sunday, September 29, 2013

Songs I am currently feeling

Hope everyone had a good weekend. I thought I'd share with you some songs I am currently feeling. Hopefully you find a gem or two in the list.

My list wouldn't be complete without The Weeknd and I'd just tell you to listen to the whole album, but these are my three favorite songs on his latest album:
Have a great week ahead. I am sure I have forgotten a few but let me know if theres any you like.

Friday, September 20, 2013

Friday Randoms

Hi my people. My goodness, its been such a long time. Life men, it really knows how to get in the way. Thank you all for all the birthday wishes! I truly appreciate it. For the most part, I always do something for my birthday but I have to say this year's birthday ranks high as one of my most useless birthdays. It was so uneventful it was ridiculous. For one, I went to work. I had the day off but corporate decided that was the day we had to move. So it was just a mess with the office in disarray and everyone annoying me. The devil was trynna use people to get to me, I almost wept from frustration. The day finally ended and I got home to my empty apartment but I received lovely cards from two of my friends with one of them that had a note and a list of nice things about me that made me cry. People called to wish me well, so was on the phone for most of it then I made myself some eba and had it with onugbu a friend had made for me (I am not even joking) and I watched Sons of Anarchy and went to sleep. Sounds meh-ish abi? BUUUUT I made up for it during the weekend. See the thing is most of my good friends don't live in my city so my friend told me to get my ass to houston. I had friday off, so I did and I had a fun fun weekend. Smoked lots of hookah, got my light weight ass buzzed and had a lovely birthday dinner and even got cake. so yay to turn around and shout out to my friend for organizing and making sure I had a good time. I still have 2 dinner and drinks to cash in on and I get to see The Weeknd on Sunday woohooo. You know its real love when I am missing the Emmys for him, considering I have seen him twice before. Okay once again, Thank you!!! and let's random.

I don't like when people rant and vex about Naija and they say "but it's your country". It reminds me way too much of a dead beat dad who ain't acting right and when you choose not to stand for it some people say "but he's your dad". Umm and so?

These weddings in Naij are so lavish. Can any of these children afford these wedding on their own? Na the parents wey dey sponsor abi?

Speaking of, are there any legitimate people of our generation who are as wealthy as their parent's generation? I often wonder sometimes what the plan is for rich kids when their parents pass away. There's an increasing number of "rich kids" who don't work. I guess they inherit it?

You see a couple going through a divorce and you can't help but wonder what went wrong when you remember how in love they were at their wedding.

It really should be standard knowledge that love is not enough to sustain a relationship. Love is a great thing. Not all love is healthy though and it seems to cloud judgement. Values, Beliefs etc should also be in line in addition to love. Those are important.

The reasoning behind "divorce is not an option" makes sense but how much can one endure. I would imagine that it feels sucky to feel stuck and alone in an unhappy marriage. Most say thats why most of our parents have long lasting marriages. I think they did because they endured. And I think most of them were unhappy. The problem is now we allow ourselves to be happy and we have way too many options.

Someone asked me about naija weddings and I am like lately you can smell the desperation. It's strong. You can literally smell hunting and preying. Girls darting their eyes looking for who is eligible or not, people asking how's the wedding? any single men? find anyone? and guys chatting up any and everyone hoping to smash. At the end of the day the question is usually not how's the couple it's did you meet anyone?

It irks me when people say " I have no regrets, everything I have done has made me and led me to who I am today" Umm okay, Dali Lama. I mean we are human beings, noone's saying you can change it or you won't be who I am, you don't know what you could have been, you could have been better. Just admit to things you may have done differently/

Speaking of would you regret things you did over things you didn't do?

I think if I was a guy I'd be a (bigger) douche.

Well, that's all I got for yall. Have a wonderful wonderful weekend. Be safe and stay blessed. Love this song below, I expect to hear it at a lot of weddings.

Monday, September 9, 2013

Another year, Another +1

Another year, another thank you to God for giving me life to see another year. It's been a tough year since the last birthday ( I feel like I say this every time but hopefully that's not true). Anyways, I'm thankful for the grace, strength and opportunity to deal with all. I'm thankful for the fun times I'm able to have with my friends and family, that I can afford for myself  and the kindness and love by strangers, friends and acquaintances. Thank you blog family for still reading my blog after all these years and for being kind. For the first time in a while, I'm actually doing nothing for my birthday and actually even going to work. Change is good abi? Lol. Ehen and for those of you who don't believe in the love me and Abel (the weeknd to you mere mortals) share, his album comes out tomorrow, make sure you get it. Also Sons of Anarchy debuts tomorrow, so should be a good day overall. Have a wonderful rest of the week guys and happy birthday to me!

Friday, September 6, 2013

Things Your Single Friends Wish You’d Stop Saying To Them

Hi guys, happy friday! Happy New month too, it's my month of September, the month I get to add one more year to my life gracefully. So I had randoms all ready except I forgot it was Friday and I had to post them, I'll post them in the next day or two. In the meantime, here's something a friend just sent to me that I thought was funny. It was written by one of Tamera's best friends, Andrea (if you watch the show then you will know who she is). Figured i'd copy and paste for you guys. Which one is the most annoying? I think #2 and #3 for me. Have a lovely weekend!

1.) “You’re such an amazing person. I don’t understand why you’re still single!”

My dear, sweet friends have the best intentions when they make this statement. They think they’re giving me a compliment. My friends love me and can’t imagine why some strapping stud hasn’t scooped me up by now. Thank you, friends, for thinking that I am amazing. Really. I TOTALLY appreciate it! But I’d like to know what on Earth that has to do with my relationship status? Some of the best human beings I know are still single. If being a good person is directly correlated to being in a relationship, wouldn’t all the bad people in the world be single? Haven’t we all met some downright awful people who are blissfully coupled up? And what’s so bad about being single anyway? Some of us actually enjoy it. You might be thinking, “That girl is in denial! Nobody likes being single!” But if I’m being honest, I truly enjoy my singlehood. I like not having anyone else to consider when making big decisions. I crave alone time. I love being able to go wherever I want, whenever I want and with whomever I want. I’ve worked hard to get to this place. After my last heartbreak, I decided to take some time to get my stuff together. I felt like I had been obsessing about one guy or another from the time I hit puberty until well into my twenties. After years of focusing on the men in my life, I decided it was time to focus on myself. I dug deep and tried to figure out why I always picked the wrong guy and why I allowed myself to get into a pattern of unhealthy relationships. I decided to focus on my relationships with God, family and friends. I worked on my goals and dreams. I’m so grateful for this time of self-discovery. For those of you who are struggling in your singlehood, I encourage you to take full advantage of this time in your life. Figure out what makes you happy. Identify your strengths and weaknesses. Spend time with your loved ones. Volunteer for worthy causes. Move forward with your dreams. It’s time to start being grateful for your single life instead of focusing on what you don’t have. Our married and coupled up friends can help this process by celebrating our singlehood instead of treating it like bad place we need to hurry up and get out of. We know you mean well, but next time please stop the sentence at, “you’re such an amazing person” - then tell us how hot we are :)

2.) “How’s your dating life going? You seriously haven’t met ANYONE?” 

Define “anyone”. Haha...Does the grocery store clerk who used his last name (Hung) to describe his male anatomy and then asked if I want him to be my papacito for the night count? What about the guy I went on a date with that just stared at me all night with a creepy serial killer look? Oh how about the guy who hit on me at the car wash? We were actually having a great conversation and about to exchange numbers until he got a call…FROM HIS GIRLFRIEND. Yes, my loving friends & family, I’ve met lots of people, and not all of them have been crazy. Some just don’t work out. I still have hope that there are some awesome men out there and when I do meet someone special, I will let you know. I promise! I’ll scream it from the mountaintops, tweet, update my Facebook status and post a pic on instagram. You’ll know. Believe me. Please stop starting our conversations by asking about my dating life. Ask me about what’s going on in my life. I’ll have lots of fun and exciting stuff to fill you in on!

3.) “Maybe you’re just too picky”

Aaaaand maybe I should punch you in the face? Okay, okay I’m just joking and not condoning violence here, but if I hear this one more time I might actually punch someone in the face…or at least give them a really dirty look! I am not picky. I am selective. There is a difference. According to, “Picky” means “extremely fussy or finicky, usually over trifles.” Trifles are trivial or insignificant things. I am not concerned with trivial things. I don’t care what color his hair is, how much he can bench press, or what car he drives. I care most about a man’s character and values. It’s okay have preferences, but I encourage you to take a look at the list of things you want in a mate. If any of the characteristics on your list are trivial, maybe it’s time to reevaluate your priorities. I’ve made bad dating decisions in the past. Surviving those experiences brings wisdom. There is nothing wrong with making wise decisions. I’ve earned my right to be selective, to choose carefully. So have you! We need to make good dating choices ladies because forever is a LONG time. We don’t want to end up married to a bad decision.

4.) “OMG I think I just met your husband! He’s perfect for you!”

My friends are amazing. They are always on the lookout for my man (I’m lookin’ at you Tamera Mowry-Housley). They are happily married and desperately want that kind of happiness for me too. I love them for it. I do. But this statement scares the heck outta me! Husband? Already? Can I please meet the guy before we start calling him my husband? I’m all for being set up. Bring it on! It’s a great way to meet new people. It’s fun and exciting. But, please don’t call him my husband, unless you want me to run as fast as I can in the opposite direction. We know all you married friends want us to join you in the wedded bliss club, but please go easy on the “perfect guy” talk. It’s a lot of pressure for the poor fella! What if he doesn’t live up to our expectations? What if we don’t see what you see? What if we really like him and because you planted the husband seed, we start watering it and it grows and grows. Before you know it we’re planning the perfect wedding in our heads before our meal even arrives…or so I’ve heard ;) We appreciate you keeping an eye out, but please proceed with caution.

5.) “I can’t wait until you get married and have kids. You have NO IDEA how hard life can be.”

I’ve had some exhausted and stressed out friends say this to me and it was one of the most brought up statements that bothered other single gals the most. We know our mom friends are going through a lot and don’t mean to sound condescending, but we can’t help but be offended. It feels like they are saying that the things we are going through don’t matter because they are not as important as being a wife and mother. Again, that might not be what you mean, but it’s how we take it. I completely respect their positions. Being a wife and mother are very important and they’re right - I have no idea how hard it is to be married and adjust to having a man around ALL THE TIME. (I’m praying for a husband who travels a lot. Haha!)  I don’t know what it’s like to hold a precious little one in my arms and be responsible for making sure that little person becomes a God-fearing, respectable member of society. I can’t imagine the pressure they must be under and I’m here, as a friend, to help alleviate any of that stress. On the flipside, they don’t know what it’s like to have my demanding job, or the stresses of my family and my life. We’re all friends here right? We need to support each other. It’s not a competition. We’re not trying to win a medal for who lives the hardest life. We all have different challenges. Let’s try to be more compassionate about these challenges and build each other up. Girlfriends unite! Woo hoo!

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest! Stay tuned for part 2 of this post. Do you single gals have any more things to add to this list? Has anyone ever said one of these things to your single friends? 

Sunday, August 25, 2013

I am Wonderful

Today was a tough day for me. This song came up on the ipod and I haven't heard it in a while. I've written about it some time ago. I still like it. Too bad, he was a one hit wonder. "Hit" used lightly. Have a good week ahead.

The person that you were has died
You've lost the sparkle in your eyes
You feel the life - into this traps
Now you wanna bridge the gaps
Now you wanna bridge the gaps
Now you want that person back

And all your ammunition's gone
Run out of fuel to carry on
You don't know what you wanna do
You've got no pull to pull you through

Say "I am"
Say "I am"
Say "I am wonderful"

Say "I am"
Say "I am"
Say "I am wonderful"

If what you've lost cannot be found
And the weight of the world weighs you down
No longer with the will to fly
You stop to let it pass you by
Don't stop to let it pass you by
You've gotta look yourself in the eye

Cause we are all miracles
Wrapped up in chemicals
We are incredible
Don't take it for granted, no
We are all miracles
Oh we are

Don't take it for granted, no
We are all miracles
Wrapped up, yeah we're wrapped up
Oh we are wonderful

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

What is Love?

Hi my little friends. It has been a moment, hasn't it? I am sorry. I've been so busy and so much going on, I just haven't had the desire or time to blog. Have I missed much? I have had an okay week so far, I think the word for it should be eventful actually. Anyone else, a time warner customer? This whole CBS/Showtime withholding is on a different level. I actually wouldn't care, cuz I don't watch a lot of shows on CBS but Big Brother is on and it airs 3 times a week. It's such a pain waiting for links and struggling through them when they freeze. I went to Toronto last weekend, it was fun. First time, being in Canada. You expect it to be just like the U.S but it really isn't. Lots of interacial couples and boy is that place expensive for no reason, you don't even get free refills! hehe. I went to see Bruno Mars on Monday and I honestly want to say that is the best concert I have ever been to, but I will chill on that and think on it before I make it fact. If you get the chance, go see him. *scratches head* umm, I have nothing else to add..oh yea, the title of my post. I read this on a blog and liked it, so I am sharing.

"The older I get, the more the annoying term "marriage" gets thrown my way. I have surmised it to this:

In the movie, 'Music From Another Room' there's this scene where Jude Law expresses his love for a girl he has known/loved since she was born:

"You know how when you're listening to music playing from another room? And you're singing along because it's a tune that you really love? When a door closes or a train passes so you can't hear the music anymore, but you sing along anyway... then, no matter how much time passes, when you hear the music again you're still in exact same time with it. That's what it's like."

For me, this is love"

(stolen from

What do you guys think?

Happy Hump Day. 

Have a good rest of the week. 

Don't forget to check out

If you'd like to do a writeup for Fan Friday email me at

ok Bye!

Wednesday, July 31, 2013


Leggy told me to read this blog about two platonic friends who decided to date each other for 40 days. There are a lot of quotes in there  - Anyways, I found this funny:

Love birds, I know this isn't the case, so don't get up in arms and say this is so wrong. It's clearly an exaggerated joke that I found funny. Happy Hump Day.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Friday Randoms

Howdy guys. You don't know how glad I am that it is Friday. I had a long week this week and last. Just hectic and I am looking forward to being home this weekend and not seeing an airport for a long long while. I haven't had a headache in a while and I have a raging headache right now, I probably need to go to sleep. Well, hope you guys had a good week, we thank God for giving us the gift of life. Not much happened this week news wise save for the brouhaha over the royal baby being born and Anthony Weiner getting caught again. So, I might as well begin randoming.

Tamera Mowry-Housley recently revealed that she lost her virginity to her now husband at age 29 and it seemed some people found that odd or strange or whatever. I've never understood why people get so concerned about other people's sex decisions. She chose to wait and it worked for her and her husband and they are happy. The belief that you must be boring or can't be a freak (as was mentioned on her talk show) is just like huh? And just because everyone is sexing doesn't mean there aren't people choosing to wait.

The death of Corey Monteith is still a bit shocking. I look at his interviews, pictures and he just seemed so okay. Goes to show, you never know what anyone is going through. I even went back to watch the pilot of Glee. It had me feeling for Lea Michelle and wondering how it must feel to lose a boyfriend. I mean when you lose a husband, it's recognized and it is official but with a boyfriend it's just..I don't know sha..just wondered.

I also wonder if people can poop and eat at the same time.

I have come to learn that a lot of men think that women are illogical. Isn't that statement enough to assume that most men think they are superior to women? or is it apples to oranges?

Last weekend, someone told me that I did not look like an igbo girl because igbo girls usually have a lot going on. I said how? He said that they usually have loads of makeup on their face. I didn't think of it as some sort of compliment at all but I have to admit that yes I am aware it is a stereotype and my first reaction was to agree with him.

Is it weird for a married person to want to travel alone? or rather is it shady? I would assume that being married, every now and then someone would want time alone just to be alone. is that bad?

Its been said that don't share what you don't want others to know and once you tell one person you bear the risk of others knowing. It is still kinda weird when you find out someone breaks your confidence.

Is twats a curse word? I said that earlier this week and my friend said that I cursed. I never considered it a curse word.

Hopefully I can phrase this right, but a turn off for me is when men are so overly ambitious. Don't get me wrong, nothing wrong with being ambitious but when they are so consumed by it and it is all about the money and making lots of it, while the emotional/family part suffers. There has to be a balance.

Can I just say that I have the most ridiculous dreams? sheesh

I kinda snapped at my friend this week. I am just over everyone and their desire to find a man. I mean I get it. We are of age, everyone's getting married and all, but life still continues. This all consuming frenzy that's sweeping over our age mates is a bit scary. Like, let's all just breathe and relax and let life least I think.

Radio this morning was bashing Huma Abedin for sticking by Anthony Weiner for a second time and calling her weak. I don't get. She made a choice to stay. It is not for everyone but maybe its because it's a 3year marriage and she has a 1yr old baby, maybe she is a devout muslim and divorce is not an option, . It could be for many reasons but I just think it is unfair to assume the one default that she is weak.

"We're not friends, we're not enemies. We're strangers with some memories"

"I can tell you've never been in love cuz you still run from it. People that have felt love run toward it, no matter the cost"

That's all I got for you guys today. Don't forget to check out Have a wonderful weekend. Stay safe and stay blessed!!

Monday, July 22, 2013

Fan Fridays

Hey readers of the blog,

How are you? Hope you had a good weekend. I have been away from home for a whole week and I really missed my apartment. Had a great week/weekend and glad to be home. Today i come to ask y'all a favor. I am starting something new on my sister blog - called Fan Fridays. It is basically an outlet to gush about someone/something you are a huge fan of. It could be a book, movie, tv show, actor, singer, album etc, as long as it is pop culture related. I would love to hear from you guys and have a bunch of entries that I could put up on Fridays. I know it might be asking much from your busy schedule but it doesn't have to be long or anything as long as it conveys your fandom/excitement.

If you are interested in doing a write up, please feel free to email me at If you are unsure about a topic and have any questions, you can email me or tweet me your question at @taynementdotcom.  Part of my goal is for it to serve as a recommendation platform, that might expose people to a body of work they might otherwise not have considered. The first post will debut on Friday and I am pretty excited. Please share with any and everyone and I really hope to hear back from you guys!


Have a lovely week!

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Rest in Peace, Trayvon Martin

As many of you have heard, the jury reached a verdict yesterday and Zimmerman was found guilty and naturally, emotions ran high. It hit me hard, like really hard. I can't believe he is walking free. So many fingers are being pointed. I don't know..I had a lot of things going through my mind and even if I don't want to admit it, the whole situation all does boil down to race.

I can say the prosecution didn't come hard enough, I can say the jury was biased, I can say there were no facts but ultimately the stereotype against a young black boy wearing a hoodie is what has him dead today. How the important fact that, if Zimmerman didn't follow Trayvon as instructed and just waited for the cops that his life might have been saved or if Zimmerman didn't have a gun, he might still be alive. Why didn't his self defense have him shot in the leg or something to immobilize him and not to his death? Where does self defense come in when this young man was unarmed? I don't know man but it's just such a reminder of the world we live in.

I watch Big Brother, the summer reality show where housemates are locked in a house all summer and this summer it's been making headlines for all the racism going on in the house. I watched a video clip, last week where the white girls were antagonizing the black girl (they'd taken her mattress and thrown her pillows around) when she asked who did it, the white girl said in her version of a "sassy black girl" said "whatchu gonna dooo girl?" and was rolling her neck and snapping fingers. Another went to her face and said "what are you gonna do? let the black out of you?" What does that even mean? The clip made me so sad, that in this day and age, this is what we are still experiencing in our "post racial" society.

We can bury our heads in the sand and maybe say African Americans are doing the most, but as I have said before, We Nigerians, can be quite closed minded. We might never understand their struggles or think we are "different" but ultimately to the rest of the world we are all black. And honestly, it could happen to any one of us or our people. The most important thing right now is wishing the comfort and grace of God to the family and loved ones of Trayvon Martin and also for everyone else who has been a victim of injustice and paid dearly for it with their lives. May God keep us safe and protect us always.

PS RIP Cory Monteith.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Friday Random

7/11 guys. Hope you guys with 7/11 in your cities went and claimed your free slushies. Happy Friday guys, hope the week was kind to you. I had a good week actually. Busy, but good all the same. Can I just say that this Zimmerman trial has me all in a mixed bag of emotions. I manage to catch snippets of it in the breakroom and read up on some of it and the whole thing is are they trying to base the trial on things that have no bearings on the matter at hand. The fact is a young man is dead. We are arguing about who was screaming for help. Both mothers say it is their son. How is an unarmed boy with skittles and a drink be a danger to someone with a gun?? What was the self defense? If he had stayed away like he was told to would he even be around Trayvon to tussle and "defend" himself by shooting him to death?? His poor mom is reliving the whole thing as they try to defame the boy's character. Long and short of it all is that the boy is dead and never coming back, I just wish the big picture isn't lost sight of. But sigh..what do I know? Only God knows what happened that night sha but I hope justice is served, struggle or not Zimmerman took a life. Ok enough of my yapping. Random we shall.

My coworker is convinced that the mattress shops you see everywhere are a cover for another kind of business. He claims there's a mattress store in every corner (which is true) and noone needs/buys mattresses that often for them to be that many. Which is true because for one they are way overpriced and there are still bargain stores and online deals. Made me wonder sha.

I realized that I have no emotional connection to any holidays.

This is not fact o, but after speaking to a lot of my guy friends. Regardless of whether they are in a happy relationship or not, I was thinking that maybe a lot of men don't trust women. I think that's what plays a part in the generalization that men are dogs because of the shadiness. Sometimes I think it's what makes it easier for those that are shady towards women? (this made more sense in my head, so I'll stop trying to explain now)

I get that Kate Upton has massive funbags but I don't care much for her body. Her torso is kinda weird.

I am probably in the minority but I found Magna Carter Holy Grail boring. The beats were nice and the songs were decent but I just wasn't moved. Like Yeezus I thought was not a good album but certain songs, I'd just pause and be like hmm but with MCHG it was like one long flat line.

Would you be averse to putting your parents in a nursing home? Not just any, like a decent one. I get the emotional and cultural reasons most Nigerians would have but life doesn't always work the way we want. What would be your reasons if you are averse to it?

Someone on twitter asked why it was called "fasting"? That's a good question, I wonder how it came about.

How many of you honestly really think all men [will] cheat? I don't think all men will cheat but I do think most will. I think the part that baffles me most is the disassociation. Too many cases of a man being loving and the best boo ever to his girl/wife but still able to cheat. Well, not surprising they do say they do stuff without emotion. ah well.

"Why would anyone ever give up being a man? It's like winning the lottery and giving it back". Quote from Orange is The New Black, the new Netflix series. I am 3 episodes in and I am loving it.

Oh before I go a few shout outs:

The UmuIgboUnite Convention is holding in Dallas this year, for anyone or anyone you know who might be interested feel free to visit the website to see what they are about and to learn more.

Guys, be kind and visit my CILy's site here. It's basically a wealth of information if you are interested in knowing more and learning about laying a foundation for kids from birth.

As always, please don't forget to visit and share with your friends :)

I really should go to sleep. I have a long weekend ahead but I get to see John Mayer yay! Have a wonderful weekend my lovelies and as always stay safe and stay blessed.