Thursday, August 27, 2009


Dudes, I don't know what happened but it's like as soon as I stepped foot on U.S soil it literally sucked my blogging mojo out of me. You don't know how many times I have come on here to post and my mind just goes blank and I have nothing to say. My people help me oh, how can I get it back?:(..Maybe it's cuz I am back to my dull life, nothing happens to me especially now where I just wake up, do things, go to class sleep. I am in the job market oh, anyone wey get hookup, holla!

Going to Nigeria was a complete leap of faith, the biggest leap of faith that I have ever taken. Before I left, I was in a BAD place and my friends could testify to that. I hated my job, I was homesick, my self-esteem was at a low, I was looking for an internship and couldn't find one and that just added to my despair, add some more unpleasant stuff and basically everything for the most part sucked!.I was literally just existing from day to day, with me hating my life and myself more as each day passed. I am not where I should be in my relationship with God, but I believe in prayer but at this point I couldn't even pray. I just felt empty.

My mom was already worrying from across the ocean and basically just said the same thing over and over: Come home! (well except once when she literally commanded me over the phone to "be happy!" to which I responded by bursting into tears, lol). Yeah it was that bad. Only a few friends knew what I was going through, my best friend even panicked and told me to go see a shrink and get on medication lol(her excuse is she is med school). I started toying with the idea of going home, at least I'd be among family, but I had to work, I still had bills to pay. On the other hand, there are opportunities in Nigeria and I don't know if my future would bring me back, now would be a good time to learn a lot and see if I could live in Nigeria again. So my darling mother began Operation Pass Taynement's resume everywhere. She contacted everyone she could think of but I still hadn't heard anything. I began to waver, what if I am making a mistake, I couldn't leave the comfort of my job, could I?As much as I hated it, I was good at it and it paid the bills COuld I still live in Nigeria again?. A friend of mine encouraged me to buy my ticket, he told me just buy it out of faith and that way you can't back out of it. He sent me texts that'd say "buy, buy, buy!", my CILy told me to just do it! and everything will work out. So in march with a pounding heart and no prospect of a job in nigeria I bought my ticket. I was happy but every now and then I'd think, "WTF did I just do?". But I realise now that that was the beginning of my journey in Faith.

March rolled by and still no job, April was almost over and still nothing but I still had a feeling that something will come up and I had faith. At this point I had slowly began to pray again. One day my cousin in naija called me up and said she had forwarded my resume and I would have an interview for a job that was within my field. I had a phone interview, I got an email asking my salary range and just like that in a day, I found a job.(Point for Jesus, cuz it sho' as heck wasn't my doing). I began to relax more and realise that everything was in his Hands. I had a lot to do (and pay for). I had to move out my apartment, get my stuff in storage, suspend some of my accounts, pay up some bills etc. I took all in stride, turned in my two week notice and focused on my trip to Europe. When I returned from Europe, I had about less than a week to get myself together and go to Nigeria. Let's just say everything worked out, God came through at all the right times. If you have read my previous blog posts, I enjoyed my stay and learned a lot there.

Now I am back and my lesson in Faith is still in progress. I am currently looking for a job and living off of my savings (which isn't much), A good friend of mine was kind enough to let me stay with her, I lost my keys while I was away, my car was totalled by a friend while I was away. The old me would have been stressing something fierce, I mean I do get worried every now and then but ultimately I have faith that everything will be okay. Just as long as I Trust in HIM it'll all be okay.

I guess my basic gist of the matter is as cliche as it may seem, a little faith goes a long way even when you don't realise it. It makes life easier and gets you through the day. There are some things that you can't control, so instead of worrying just hand over the reigns and have FAITH :).

So I received two questions and my answers are below:

From BSNC:
Q:You seem to like music alot, any plans to go into the music bizness; could be singing, producing, writing..
A: When I was younger, all I wanted to do was to be a singer. I have a decent voice so I used to make songs up. I got a tape recording thingie, so I'd sing into it. In college, I used to sing with a friend at school events and at nigerian functions but I had the worst stage fright and eventually stopped. I have a song somewhere with a friend of mine when we were playing around. See long tori, basically I'd only be interested at this stage in my life in working behind the scenes for a record company in artist development.

Q: What inspired you to open blogger, have you enjoyed it along the way?

A : Diablo Cody(she wrote Juno) was a stripper who had a blog, she got discovered that way and is now an Oscar winner and a writer for my favorite magazine - Entertainment Weekly. I opened my blog to get out all the entertainment random thoughts I had that most people don't share while secretly hoping I'd get discovered, lol. Somewhere along the line, I deviated and started writing about everything else but entertainment, yes I have enjoyed it. It's amazing how some of us have similar lives and how we encourage each other.

The second set of questions:

Q :real age?
will u date a trans gendered folk?
what turns u on in the opp. sex?

A :
I will be 27 in 2 weeks

Lol, that would be a no. The whole idea would be too uncomfortable for me, well unless I didn't know.

Mysteriousness, good kisser, take charge attitude.

Well, hope I didn't overcompensate with this blogpost. Thanks to the two bloggers who asked questions. Hope y'all have a wonderful weekend!

Monday, August 24, 2009

Welcome Back

Hi people, it has been a long ass time since I posted oh! chei. In the time I haven't been here, I have returned to the states and I had so many mental blog posts, it's a shame I don't remember them. I hope everyone has been doing well, besides fretting about being single or married.:D. I have been trying to get back to some semblance of my life back but I happened to be under the weather and just now managed to have my cold and cough under control. I hope I can come back and do one last wrap up of my naija blog post. Hope everyone has a fabulous evening!

PS - The whole getting to know Taynement deal was an epic fail. I only got one question and I will be answering it in my next blogpost.

Once again, have a wonderful day/night!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

SheWolf in the Closet, My Ass!

Excuse my recent blog title but anyone who is on my facebook should have an idea of what I am about to rant about. So I just saw Shakira's "Shewolf" video. (Youtube if you can, as usual MTN is PMSing and won't allow me find a video. the full length one might be in spanish). Anyways, I like Shakira but as I watched the video, I felt anger slowly rise in me and by the end I was utterly and thoroughly vexed.

You see, I totally get the music business is still a business. I totally get that sex sells but seriously at this point I feel insulted. If you watched the video, I dare you to tell me that you did not see Beyonce, Ciara and Madonna in that video even though Shakira was the one dancing? They are all trying to show us that they are the sexiest and the bendiest of them all. I mean Shakira should have just gone naked, why wear a flesh colored leotard? just prancing around her monkey cage, feeding me her juiceless ass cheek..uuughhh! whoooosah! I mean does anyone see my point? I don't have to speak about Ciara, who seems to be stripping more and more as her album sales fall. I dunno what the solution is but nna, I need a break from the Bendy-Sexy, biko.

In other news, I don't know if I am interesting enough but I thought it'd be cool if I did a getting to know Taynement better kinda deal. So if anyone had any questions they'd like me to answer, please feel free to email them at I would be listing the names of the questions with the blogger who asked, if you prefer to remain anonymous please let me know.

Y'all have a happy pre-friday's eve!:D

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Listening to the Lines

If there's anything you have learned about me from my blog, you must know by now that I am a huge, huge fan of music. Doesn't matter what kind, as long as my ears are happy, we are good to go. I am always on the hunt for new music and part of how I find new music is from TV shows. I am watching a tv show and my ears are primed to catch the first strums of music goodness, soon as I catch it, the next step is frantically googling the few lyrics I could eke out while adding my voice recognition skillz and voila a new song is added to the library.

Anyway, I have been wanting to blog all day but had no idea what to blog about. NEPA(PHCN, whatever) was kind enough to give light all day, so I was vegging out watching Lipstick Jungle - another reason to love Naija, I bought season 1 and 2 for like less than $5, lol - and I heard a song that I knew already but the lyrics really jumped out at me. Sara Bareilles' "Bottle it Up".


There'll be girls across the nation that will eat this up, babe
I know that it's your soul, but could you bottle it up
And get down to the heart of it, no it's my heart, you're shit out of your luck
Don't make me tell you again, my love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love

I am aiming to be somebody that somebody trusts with her delicate soul
I don't claim to know much except soon as you start to make room for the parts
That aren't you, it gets harder to bloom in a garden of love
, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love

Only thing I ever could need
Only one good thing worth trying to be and it's

Love,Love,Love,Love.I do it for love.Love,Love,Love

We can understand the sentiment you're saying to us, oh
But sensible sells, so could you kindly shut up and get started

At keeping your part of the bargain, aw please little darlin'
You're killing me sweetly with love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love

Started as a flicker, meant to be a flame
Skin has gotten thicker, but it burns the same
Still a baby in a cradle, got to take my first fall
Baby's getting next to nowhere with a back against the wall
You meant to make me happy, make me sad
Want to make it better, better so bad
But save your resolutions for your never new year
There is only one solution I can see here

Oh, only gonna get get what you give away, so give love, love
Only gonna get get what you give away

Ok, so the bolded part is pretty self-explanatory, I think. But just in case I'll try to explain. These parts jumped at me because I have never been a trusting person. I have never been in love. I use my head over my heart. I would like to be in love. I can't do that protecting my heart.Like the song says, you only get what you give away. So I do it for Love :)....Pray for me y'all :D

P.s - So for some odd reason I am compelled to post Leona Lewis' - Better in time lyrics. The words are so true, to my sisters(and brothers) going through a tough breakup, it really will get better.

Have a lovely week ahead, Blogsville!

It's been the longest winter without you
I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow I can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going coming thought I heard a knock
Who's there no one
Thinking that I deserve it
Now I realise that I really didn't know
If you didn't notice you mean everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gon' be ok

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV
Without something there to remaind me
Was it all that easy
To just put aside your feelings

If I'm dreaming don't wanna laugh
Hurt my feelings but that's the path
I believe in
And I know that time will heal it
If you didn't notice boy you meant everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gon' be ok

Since there's no more you and me
It's time I let you go
So I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is I'll be fine without you
Yes I will

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Naija Slangs

It's been a while my dear people, not sure what's going on with the internet in Nigeria but on the news they said something about some satellite blah blah blah but all I know is MTN sucks! Even on my blackberry, the internet is not working and I am not the only one.

Anywhoooos! Today I thought I'd share with you some slangs I have heard the last few months. Enjoy:

End of Discussion - Honda iVtech (car)

Baby Boy - 1999 Honda Accord

Bulldog - 1997 Honda Accord

Parole - jumpoff/girl you are talking to or women hunting
e.g - "Ah, leave that one oh, that one na my parole" or "We dey go parole"

Kabash - praying
e.g "See as this pastor dey kabash"

Tear Rubber
- Brand New
Refer to Eldee's song, "big boy"..."tear rubber everything..."

Romesh - to yarn rubbish, an update on yarning okpaks
e.g - "ol' boy why you dey yarn romesh?"

Sule - idiot/mugu (apparently a serious insult)
e.g "This boy na sule"

Kparakpa - Vernacular
e.g "Abeg no dey speak kparakpa for this place"

Straffor/Piax- basically to hit it
e.g " I go straffor/piax that girl dis night"

Hammer - To blow up or get rich quick
e.g "Timaya don blow, e don hammer"

Soapy - To wank/masturbate
e.g "Omo, agro don catch me finish, man need to soapy"

Ororo - Expensive drink

Shekpe - ogogoro

I no dey see my period - broke
e.g "Bros, please you fit gimme 500 naira?" "At all oh, I no dey see my period"

Fall my hand - dissapointing
e.g "Guy why you dey fall my hand na?"

Park Well - Behave
e.g "abeg we dey public, park well jo"

Para - overreact
e.g "It's not that serious, why you dey para?"

Well that's all I have and I am sure there are many more out there that I have no clue about. In other news, its only God that protects us here oh. My coworker told me a story of how his friend got into a cab and the cab driver pulled over, whipped out a gun and beat her with it then robbed her. She ended up being in the hospital. My friend also told me that story and I wondered if it was the same person, he also told me of a chic that took an okada and he took her to the bushes and raped her. May God help us all! Have a lovely rest of the week!