Thursday, August 27, 2009

Faith

Dudes, I don't know what happened but it's like as soon as I stepped foot on U.S soil it literally sucked my blogging mojo out of me. You don't know how many times I have come on here to post and my mind just goes blank and I have nothing to say. My people help me oh, how can I get it back?:(..Maybe it's cuz I am back to my dull life, nothing happens to me especially now where I just wake up, do things, go to class sleep. I am in the job market oh, anyone wey get hookup, holla!

Going to Nigeria was a complete leap of faith, the biggest leap of faith that I have ever taken. Before I left, I was in a BAD place and my friends could testify to that. I hated my job, I was homesick, my self-esteem was at a low, I was looking for an internship and couldn't find one and that just added to my despair, add some more unpleasant stuff and basically everything for the most part sucked!.I was literally just existing from day to day, with me hating my life and myself more as each day passed. I am not where I should be in my relationship with God, but I believe in prayer but at this point I couldn't even pray. I just felt empty.

My mom was already worrying from across the ocean and basically just said the same thing over and over: Come home! (well except once when she literally commanded me over the phone to "be happy!" to which I responded by bursting into tears, lol). Yeah it was that bad. Only a few friends knew what I was going through, my best friend even panicked and told me to go see a shrink and get on medication lol(her excuse is she is med school). I started toying with the idea of going home, at least I'd be among family, but I had to work, I still had bills to pay. On the other hand, there are opportunities in Nigeria and I don't know if my future would bring me back, now would be a good time to learn a lot and see if I could live in Nigeria again. So my darling mother began Operation Pass Taynement's resume everywhere. She contacted everyone she could think of but I still hadn't heard anything. I began to waver, what if I am making a mistake, I couldn't leave the comfort of my job, could I?As much as I hated it, I was good at it and it paid the bills COuld I still live in Nigeria again?. A friend of mine encouraged me to buy my ticket, he told me just buy it out of faith and that way you can't back out of it. He sent me texts that'd say "buy, buy, buy!", my CILy told me to just do it! and everything will work out. So in march with a pounding heart and no prospect of a job in nigeria I bought my ticket. I was happy but every now and then I'd think, "WTF did I just do?". But I realise now that that was the beginning of my journey in Faith.

March rolled by and still no job, April was almost over and still nothing but I still had a feeling that something will come up and I had faith. At this point I had slowly began to pray again. One day my cousin in naija called me up and said she had forwarded my resume and I would have an interview for a job that was within my field. I had a phone interview, I got an email asking my salary range and just like that in a day, I found a job.(Point for Jesus, cuz it sho' as heck wasn't my doing). I began to relax more and realise that everything was in his Hands. I had a lot to do (and pay for). I had to move out my apartment, get my stuff in storage, suspend some of my accounts, pay up some bills etc. I took all in stride, turned in my two week notice and focused on my trip to Europe. When I returned from Europe, I had about less than a week to get myself together and go to Nigeria. Let's just say everything worked out, God came through at all the right times. If you have read my previous blog posts, I enjoyed my stay and learned a lot there.

Now I am back and my lesson in Faith is still in progress. I am currently looking for a job and living off of my savings (which isn't much), A good friend of mine was kind enough to let me stay with her, I lost my keys while I was away, my car was totalled by a friend while I was away. The old me would have been stressing something fierce, I mean I do get worried every now and then but ultimately I have faith that everything will be okay. Just as long as I Trust in HIM it'll all be okay.

I guess my basic gist of the matter is as cliche as it may seem, a little faith goes a long way even when you don't realise it. It makes life easier and gets you through the day. There are some things that you can't control, so instead of worrying just hand over the reigns and have FAITH :).
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GETTING TO KNOW TAYNEMENT

So I received two questions and my answers are below:

From BSNC:
Q:You seem to like music alot, any plans to go into the music bizness; could be singing, producing, writing..
A: When I was younger, all I wanted to do was to be a singer. I have a decent voice so I used to make songs up. I got a tape recording thingie, so I'd sing into it. In college, I used to sing with a friend at school events and at nigerian functions but I had the worst stage fright and eventually stopped. I have a song somewhere with a friend of mine when we were playing around. See long tori, basically I'd only be interested at this stage in my life in working behind the scenes for a record company in artist development.

Q: What inspired you to open blogger, have you enjoyed it along the way?

A : Diablo Cody(she wrote Juno) was a stripper who had a blog, she got discovered that way and is now an Oscar winner and a writer for my favorite magazine - Entertainment Weekly. I opened my blog to get out all the entertainment random thoughts I had that most people don't share while secretly hoping I'd get discovered, lol. Somewhere along the line, I deviated and started writing about everything else but entertainment, yes I have enjoyed it. It's amazing how some of us have similar lives and how we encourage each other.

The second set of questions:

Q :real age?
will u date a trans gendered folk?
what turns u on in the opp. sex?


A :
I will be 27 in 2 weeks

Lol, that would be a no. The whole idea would be too uncomfortable for me, well unless I didn't know.

Mysteriousness, good kisser, take charge attitude.

Well, hope I didn't overcompensate with this blogpost. Thanks to the two bloggers who asked questions. Hope y'all have a wonderful weekend!

10 comments:

Temite said...

I am so happy for you. I did the EXACT same thing about 3 months ago and I am incredibly glad that I did! IT is well. Know that Gods got you in his hands and his thoughts towards you are good and he has made everything beautiful in its time. XOXO!

Original Mgbeke said...

I really enjoyed reading this. :-)

blogoratti said...

Nothing like home eh...
A little faith goes a long way even when you don't realise it -liked that!
Guess something bigger is on the horizon waiting to find you..my hope is that it does soon-hang in there!

MPB said...

ah to have faith; so simple a concept yet so hard to implement...

Reverence said...

wow! its posts like this that make me realize why i love blogville *hugs*

BSNC said...

i like te fact that you are not worried, you just put everything in God's hand..

thanks for answering my question, lol i get the gist..

TayneMent said...

@Temite - Thank you much for the nice words.

@OM - Glad you liked it :D

@'Ratti - Amen! thank you

@MPB - yup, seems nothing in life is easy.

@Reverence - lol, thanks.

@BSNC - I slip up sometimes but for the most part I know He got me. Thanks for getting the gist lol

Kate said...

Aah faith...it's shakeable..yeah..we are human after all. But as you've shown and you show everyday..even just the smallest amount..mustard seed sized faith can move mountains..so you go girl! Watch those mountains move!

Tori said...

Taking a little inspiration. I'm glad that this is already a story ( I believe that every bad experience in life is a story you'lleventually tell) :)

CIL said...

Awww... :D:D:D
This made me smile...