Saturday, October 18, 2014

My Harry Potter Experience

Before I go into my post. I don't respond individually to comments unless I am asked a question, but I always try to respond in the post after. So I wanted to say thank you to you guys for your kind thoughts and comments on my last post. I appreciate it. I truly was having a bad day that day but we keep on trucking and I am hanging in there and taking each day as it comes. For those who reached out to me offline, thank you to you too. I appreciate it. Ok on to Harry Potter.

So I had just arrived in America when the Harry Potter phenomenon was taking place and I read the first one for sure. I don't remember how many more I read but I stopped reading. Fast forward many more years later, I had always said I wanted to read the whole series. Amazon has a Netflix type program except it's for books and in August, the best friend informed me that first timers get a 30 day free trial. Decided to take the opportunity to read all 7 books in the series.

The books were great. I loved them and enjoyed them very much. I was very much in awe of how JK Rowling was able to write a book that could appeal to adults and kids at the same time. You could tell every story was well thought out and fleshed out, that and the characters. Everything was connected. So while I liked the series as a whole, Book 5 was the exception. It was such a doozy and took me forever to get through. It just dragged.

I found Harry Potter so annoying. My god. What a brat! I know he'd been through a lot and was fighting for his life and all but geez mr. get a grip on your temper. He was so impulsive and had a huge savior complex. At first, I thought I liked Dumbledore but honestly, noone can be that even keel. It got annoying after a while. my favorite character was Ginny Weasley. She was just a confident person that wouldn't take any shit. And clearly her milkshakes brought constant boys to the yard (ok that sounded dirtier than it really is but you catch my drift)

I don't think I can say much more without giving any spoilers but overall, I am glad I read it and all the kudos to J.K Rowling.


Monday, October 13, 2014

The Other Side of Cancer

Cancer just doesn't eat away at the insides of a person. It just burns a hole through any and everyone around it.

The other side of cancer that isn't discussed is how it affects the loved ones of the person who has the cancer. You can't really complain because ultimately it is seen as a better situation than the person who actually has the cancer.

It's a terrible feeling watching someone you love suffer and there's not a damn thing you can do about it.

Everyday you try and be there for the person, you try to encourage and be kind and just transfer all the love you have for them, secretly hoping all your goodwill will cure them and make them better even though you know it's not possible. You say these things but the thing about cancer is you never know the outcome. It does as it pleases.

You are racked with guilt because no matter how much you do, it never seems enough. Doctor to Doctor, treatment to treatment everything costs money so there's that - the financial cost of it all.

You don't have the relationship you once had. You can't laugh, joke or seek advice or share personal worries and fears because everything becomes about the cancer. Survival is the main goal. You aren't there to add to their worries but to make them feel better.

When you are (what feels like) a million miles away, everything is magnified. Every missed phone call, every doctor visit, waiting for a prognosis. When you speak on the phone and you can hear your loved one trying to put on a brave face. Everything just weighs on you. It's like you have a permanent knot in your stomach.

Again, not a damn thing you can do. No magic wand to wave it all away.

There are good days and bad days (Although right now, I can't think of the good days). Today was just one of the bad days.

Thursday, October 2, 2014

Friday Randoms

Hi Folks. We are in October. Like 90 more days till we are in 2015. Like how scary is that? 2 thousand and freaking 15. chei! *thinks of what to say* I don't know what jibber jabber to jabber you guys with so I guess I will just random.


Just as we Christians are hypocritical, I am usually amused by Muslims who hold so true to their no-pork rule but will willingly break every other rule there is. I often wonder why it is the biggest sacrilege but everything else such as sex or drinking goes. I knew someone who wouldn't touch pork with a 10 foot pole but he drank and smoked like a chimney and owned a couple of strip clubs. funny, eh?

Some things you think are common basic human courtesy, really aren't.

In that same vein, how do you handle not doing the most for people? If you are doing something nice or doing things for a person from the goodness of your heart and because you care but you know if situations are flipped it wouldn't even occur to the person to do for you. Do you just do because that's what your spirit/nature tells you to or you don't because it won't be reciprocated? If the latter, doesn't it make it seem like you are doing stuff for reward? If former, at what point are you a mumu?

A tweet came across my timeline the other day talking about people seeking validation via tweets but the avatar of the person was in booty shorts and top a bit spread eagled on a pole. Maybe it was from a pole dancing class but it felt contradictory to me. or no?

Whenever someone says "I'll make it up to you" to me. I take it with a grain of salt. It don't mean shit. Nothing is ever made up.

When you are going through the worst or a rough patch in your life. It stings seeing that "I am blessed/favored etc" declaration. You just think about your life and wonder why God doesn't love you like he does them.

Sometimes, I think I believe that the further you are from God/less religious/not that strong in your faith, the less troubles and wahala you have in your life. ( I am a little angry at God now so this might change)

Honestly, people that don't keep their dogs on a leash INFURIATE me! Ughh.

How do kids know to call their parents mommy and daddy when no one else calls them that?

If I ever had to pick between short or long hair, it will always be long hair - on anybody. I keep trying to figure out why. Even though I chopped off my hair for a brief moment some time ago. I am just team long hair. I also have never met anyone who i preferred with short hair, not even Toni Braxton and Halle Berry. It's strange. Don't get me wrong, it's not utter hatred o. Like some short dos are just too fierce for words and its definitely a refreshing different look, some women rock the hell outta of it but if you had me pick I'll almost always go for the long.

People always say they prefer to hear the truth or people being straightforward but I don't think that's the case. It's better to be fake nice, fake laugh, "lol" and destroy behind back than being honest and direct.

Please those kids that sang "No Flex Zone" how old are they? Why are they already calling people ho's and telling women to "sit on their Balmain zipper"? Uwa e mebi (hope the Igbo police don't fine me for this)

I totally get why it is easier to say fine when you are asked how you are rather than answering honestly. You don't want to be that debbie downer that always has one calamity after the other. Na to just say fine, smile, keep ya head up and move on.

There was a topic about porn the other day and people were giving a reason for watching porn is to learn stuff. I mean sure, maybe people learn from porn but it's not always realistic. Besides that, anything I know how to do, I didn't learn from porn. Anyone who has learned from porn, please I'd like to hear.

Guys, please check out www.taynement.com and tell a friend to tell a friend and tell everyone you know.

That's all I have for you guys. Have a wonderful weekend and remain blessed.





Sunday, September 28, 2014

What do you like most about....

...your significant other?

Ok..ok..before you guys roll your eyes and are tired of me and my questions. I promise this one wasn't me. Someone asked me to do it and said they would be interested in seeing what people's answers were. So I went ahead and asked friends of mine in relationships - although I should mention that most of them are married - and below are answers that I got verbatim, no edits. Enjoy! (Is enjoy the right word?)

"I love his commitment. Looooooove it"

"One thing caught my attention, another thing sparked my interest. Physique...love me a thin woman (lepa toh bad). Eccentricity... Her thought process is different from most women out there"

"Oh gosh. It's not just one thing. He's goofy, a genuinely good person that makes me want to be one too. Smart, gosh he's so smart. And he loves me fiercely. Oh and he's cute too"

"He's patient, understanding, fun(ny), has a hustler's spirit, strong leader and we have physical chemistry"

"He's a great listener, extremely understanding, always has my back, great shoulder and totally supportive"

"I like the fact that she understands me and tolerates me. She is more grounded than a lot of girls I know. She wants me to do well always and is always worried about me. I have never been more physically attracted to anyone else plus I think she has good maternal instincts and will be a great mother and house manager (although she will not be a housewife)"

"I like the way she sleeps after sex"

"I find him to be very interesting...knowledgeable about a lot of things so our conversations are never boring. He is very smart...I am a sucker for smart dudes. He is very open minded yet certain about his beliefs. He has crooked teeth. He is religious and loves music...very affectionate. He is generous too"

"His sense of humor. The fact that he can be corrected and he's kind"

"His simplicity. What you see is what you get. No second guessing necessary. His friendliness. His welcoming nature. Most people are immediately at ease in his presence"

"The most important aspect of her is she's loyal and has my best interests at heart. That to me is her most important quality, knowing she has my back.  She's also to quote my dad, "very enterprising". She's able to find creative solutions to issues.  Add those to other qualities such as looks and compatibility, it becomes clear why I decided she was the one to marry"

" I like how I can be with her, not doing anything and it's still a good time. We don't even have to talk and we're just happy to be with each other"

"His calm and cheerful spirit. His ability to forgive and look past anything. His patience and desire to improve himself. The way he laughs. His uncomplicated life perspective. How helpful he is with everything in the house. I'm currently sick and doctor says I shouldn't do anything... he will work come home, cook, grocery shop, do laundry, give me back massages. . Even when I get sad that he's doing so much...he just laughs through it. It's incredible"


Well, those are the answers that I received...i go love oooo one day (we hope). Hope you enjoyed/liked it. Did  you have any favorites? If you'd like to add yours in the comment section that's fine too. Have a wonderful week guys :)

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

+1

Here we are again. Another year has rolled by and I am one year older. I am currently sniffling with a splitting headache and my throat feels like there's a mini fire in it. My body finally gave out on me on my birthday. Regardless, I am still thankful and grateful to see another year. As always, it's been an eventful year with the good and the bad mixed in together.

I thank you God for everything and I thank you for the Grace to see another year. I thank you for prayers answered and prayers yet unanswered. I thank you for the good people you have given me as friends who genuinely have my best interests at heart. Continue to bless them for me.

Thank you to those who have reached already to wish me a happy birthday. I appreciate you all.

Happy Birthday to me.

Thursday, September 4, 2014

[Guest] Friday Randoms

Howdy guys. Hope you guys had a good week. Man, I only worked 3 days this week but it felt like 500. I totally enjoyed my labor day weekend. Me and some college friends of mine spent the long weekend at a resort in Arizona and it was so much fun. Kinda hard to believe that I have known some of these people for about 15 years and even harder to believe that people I partied with now have kids that they are responsible for. Life goes by fast sha! I have another eventful weekend ahead. Meeen, I miss my lay in weekends at home..ok not really but it's almost coming to an end. Fall is round the corner. Can you believe Christmas is 3 months away??!!!!

Today's randoms are by a friend of mine who has guested before (and you guys loved so much). If anyone would like to guest random, please feel free to hit me up. Here we go:

I have come to the considered opinion that Linda Ikeji is a shameless agbaya. Dazzol.  As they say on twitter, “argue on your TL.”

I saw a lady’s tweet over the weekend saying that a “cocksure” guy hollering at a chick without being “a touch nervous is street harassment”. Wondafu!  She also said that the “MERE (emphasis mine) sight of a group of men on the street evokes fear.” Replace men with black and we’d rightly start forming voltron.  It is one thing to rail against entitled men who misbehave, that’s valid because it happens. I’ve seen it and asked the guys to leave the chick alone. But which kin ebolic yans be this one? So without any action whatsoever, a group of men are by definition dangerous brutes? Sigh, my homie Kermit said I should go and buy sugar for the tea he’s making. I can’t abeg. Oro rirun. Shior!

I will never understand why people feel the need to “announce” their departure from social media. If you want to unplug for a bit do so. Whenever I read an “I’ll be leaving Facebook or twitter soon” post, first thing I wonder is if there’ll be a send forth ceremony and how much the aso-ebi is?

You know you’ve overdosed on wedding planning mode when as a guy, you find yourself voluntarily watching, nay DVRing “Four Weddings” on TLC.

Speaking of wedding planning, I was talking to a white coworker (guy) the other day. He too is in wedding planning mode and is pulling hair out. Women often complain about guys not wanting to be involved in the wedding planning and leaving it all to them. My coworker’s problem is that he actually has an opinion. He started out not sending oh, then his fiancé got on him. Now, dude genuinely cares what colour the napkins should be in relation to the tablecloth and other finicky stuff. This is causing wahala, but I must agree with the guy. You can’t start vexing when awon boys now have an opinion when they originally didn’t send. As for me, let’s just say that I’ve been affirmatively nodding like an agama lizard drinking quite a lot of tea lately. That is the solution to world peace in these situations.

Ehen question: Is there a derogatory word for white people in any Nigerian language? Oyibo simply means a white person. It’s descriptive, not derogatory. Funny how we have a derogatory word for American blacks (Akata-which means wild cat), but don’t seem to have one for white people. At least none that I’ve heard sha.

Translate “sha” as used above to English. Please tell me what you come up with because I can’t.              
See ehn, I don’t get people who just balk at trends in an attempt to appear too cool for school. Let us look at the ALS Ice-Bucket challenge trend for instance. Until a couple of weeks ago, many people had no clue what ALS was. Now many people do and money has been raised for ALS research. That’s a good thing. If you don’t want to pour ice water on your body and shake in the frigid cold like a cow’s dick afterwards, that’s fine, but allow people who do.  
“There is nothing so pitiful as a young cynic because he has gone from knowing nothing to believing nothing.” Maya Angelou. I like very much. That was me years ago.
The adigunjales (armed robbers) at United are now selling December tickets to Nigeria from the U.S at $2500. Fear God na. See ehn, those who take a wife and two kids to Nigeria during Christmas season are the real heroes. Especially when you realize that for that amount, there are so many other places one could visit.  Unless there’s an event like a wedding or funeral, Thailand dey, Dubai dey, Hong Kong dey, Carribean dey, ati bee bee lo. (etcetera). One will now use all this money to travel to Nigeria to experience NEPA, go-slow and “what did you bring for us?” relatives. Diarris God.
Then again, authentic Suya and roasted groundnut questionably bottled in a used bottle of Schnapps is worth the trip.
A friend shared this link which lists 10 ways to sound smart in a meeting a work. I LOLed because I’ve done quite a few of these https://medium.com/comedy-corner/10-tricks-to-appear-smart-during-meetings-27b489a39d1a
Movie recommendation: The Hundred Foot Journey starring Helen Mirren, Manish Dayal, Om Puri and a remarkable looking Charlotte Le Bon (Loved her accent too).  Saw it over the weekend and loved it. Taynement, expect a review.
Prayer request for the week: That the almighty God in his infinite mercies should smite (yes smite) my new neigbour’s incessantly barking dog, so that I can sleep. Lord hear our prayer.
Taynement here - so, my friend's sign out song was Sia's "Chandelier", as I have posted that before I decided to overrule and post a song choice of mine (It's my blog and I post what I wanna *sticks tongue out*). Thank you for the guest randoms!

There was absolutely no bias in choosing this song -___-


Tuesday, September 2, 2014

The Writer

You wait for a silence
I wait for a word
Lying next to your frame
Girl unobserved
You change your position
And you're changing me
Casting these shadows
Where they shouldn't be

We're interrupted
By the heat of the sun
Trying to prevent
What's already begun
Oh, you're just a body
I can smell your skin
And when we feel it
You're wearing thin

Oh, but I've got a plan
And why don't you be the artist?
And make me out of clay?
Why don't you be the writer?
And decide the words I say?
'Cause I'd rather pretend
I'll still be there at the end
Only it's too hard to ask
Won't you try to help me?

Sat on your sofa
It's all broken springs
This isn't the place for
Those violin strings
Oh, I try out a smile
And I aim it at you
Oh, you must have missed it
You always do

Oh, but I've got a plan
And why don't you be the artist?
And make me out of clay?
Oh, why don't you be the writer?
And decide the words I say?
‘Cause I'd rather pretend
I'll still be there at the end
Only it’s too hard to ask
Won't you try to help me?