Thursday, March 22, 2012

Friday Randoms

Forget all that talk, you never TRULY know what you will do until you are in a situation.

One of the most frustrating things is wanting and knowing you should be there for a friend but not knowing how to.

Are human beings more sensitive lately or is the world just harsher?

If you got pregnant for someone you were having casual sex with and had already made up your mind to get rid of it. Would you tell him or would you just quietly do so?

I wish people knew how uncomfortable matchmaking is for me. Too bad everyone wants to match make me.

You know that thing some people do where they ask for affirmation after every statement like "shey you get?" "do you understand what I'm saying?" etc. Irks me.

The Frank Ocean song "Denim". Is it "Gotta love like Denim" or "Got a love like Denim"

Up until last week, I realized I had not gone shopping at all this year. No new shoes, no new clothes, not even something as little as earrings.

Due to the nature of how their sex works. Do gay men call their sex missionary (since it's the norm) or will it classify as doggy style?

In Drake's "Take Care" lyrics he says "I've asked about you and they've told me things but my mind didn't change. I still the feel the same". Listening to the morning show on radio and the guys were joking about how if a dude has a new girl and one of his buddies mentions something negative like she's not cute or they don't like her, the girl's days are probably numbered. I wondered how true the statement was and how much influence a guy's friends has on his dating life. Going back to the Drake lyrics, guys and girls alike usually ask around about someone they are interested in but do you guys think it's valid? What if someone who is a player or what society deems a "ho" is genuinely interested in this particular person? Does it also imply that people can't change? How much weight do you give the feedback you get on a person you're interested in?

I watched The Announcement about Magic Johnson and how he found out he was infected with the HIV virus. I can't even begin to imagine what it was like to be told that in that time when HIV was such a mystery. The mental fuckup-edness would be massive.

It's a fascinating thing when people believe that their successes is by their might alone. Fascinating because as a Christian my mind can't even process how that works.

My mom says I am too hard on myself

It's a difficult thing to have expectations [of people/things/situations]. Almost always, disappointment is inevitable.

Men notice a lot more than women realize.

I leave you with a few quotes:

"Do not confuse being busy with being productive"
“One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you can’t utter.”
"Absence makes the heart grow impatient, frustrated, resigned and eventually fonder" (This was actually in reference to the delayed season premiere of Mad Men. Thought it was funny)
How do you measure happiness? "It's a feeling of calm that comes from inside. When you figure out what's important. When you have nothing to prove. Giving everything you do everything you've got and being satisfied, regardless of the outcome"
"Everything doesn't always have to have a purpose. Loosen up and lighten up. Be as silly as you can be sometimes. Waste time. Don't try to fill up every minute with shit you think is important because everything isn't"



I know I rag on her (because she really is annoying)but truth is I own her albums.

My favorite song on "Speak Now"

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and just for the heck of it - a bonus :D

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Monday, March 19, 2012

Grades

What grades determine:

Your ability to memorize mostly useless things
Your ability to regurgitate information in the way others want you to
Your ability to understand what adults want from you and give it to them

What grades do NOT determine:

Your intelligence
Your creativity
Your emotional capabilities
Your likeliness to succeed
Whether you’re a good person


*stolen from a friend who stole it from Tumblr

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Communication

[FYI, this post is just going to be an extended random thought, so forgive any incoherence or off-tangedness(yea i said it)]

So I had/read an article on communication in our generation which I thought I had saved and I could expand on and reference. But nah, the beauty that is technology, I can't find that anywhere. I was going to skip the post all together, till I was talking with a friend and he randomly mentioned how he thought our generation is slowly but surely losing healthy communication skills.

I put some thought into it and I can see why he said it.

With the advancement of technology, most of the modes of communication we have right now, seem so impersonal. They have become words and letters. Yes, we still have the telephone and skype but take a poll right now and you will hear most people say "I am not a phone person". Speaking to someone now seems more like an inconvenience. Heck, I know people who hate checking their voicemail. I sent a voicenote to a friend the other day and she noted that she hadn't actually heard my voice in a while. Anyone who is a perpetual texter/emailer/gchatter knows the perils of communicating via text as opposed to face to face. It leaves plenty room for misinterpretation and misunderstanding. Let's digress a bit into the whole relationship angle. Back in the day, dude asked for your number, gave you a call and you took it from there. Nowadays, the first thing is to ask for your bb pin. Ok, say you do get asked for your number, you hear more about "textual relationships". With texts, you get to think and overthink, type and delete and get a do over so to speak from your original thought. So instead of just saying your original thought, you sometimes end up saying what's safe or not speaking your mind. A quote I read, "I swear men invented texting as a way of communicating without really communicating" made me chuckle.

Let me go into the social network medium. I can't speak for others but for the most part, I don't take social networks seriously. Not seriously, like what people say on there isn't serious but it's not the final judgement of who a person is. People often think that just because they are "friends" with a person on a social network medium, they know them and don't take the time to communicate and get to know them or how they really are. "Oh, she posted a picture of herself partying and having a good time, so she must be fine". It's also pretty interesting how people are bolder behind a computer screen than in person.

Moving on from that, I also think we are becoming a repressed generation especially for the men. Do you guys see how much flack Drake gets?lol. We have this need to put up appearances that truly spewing our real thoughts might mess that up or we are scared of the ridicule or judgement that we might get from others or could it be distrust?. I think our generation get plenty pride sha dang. How many times have you heard a friend say "nope! I am not going to reach out first!"(I know I have said that) and we end up letting something last too long. That pride also makes us always focus on proving that we are right instead of actually listening to what the other party is trying to say.

Ultimately sha, we all know that Communication is very important in all relationships - with a friend, a significant other, God etc - unfortunately it is also one of the hardest things to practice. I could probably wrap this up better but I am hella distracted now and it is 1.26am. Hopefully you get my gist and feel free to leave your opinion. Have a wonderful weekend people and as always be safe!

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Growing Pains

Growing Pains
By D’edra Y. Armstrong

Romans 5:3 instructs us to “rejoice in our suffering” because it is for our growth and development. Pain prepares us for triumph. I am reminded of a fable that illustrates this perfectly.

The sunshine and the rain were engaged in a conversation one day when out of nowhere, the sunshine made a crude remark.

“You know, you really cause of a lot of trouble.”

“What do you mean?” the rain asked in bewilderment.

“You cause accidents, ruin picnics, spoil trips to the beach…the list on. But look at those people down there basking in my splendor. You know, the world would be a much better place without you,” the sunshine accused.

“I seriously doubt that,” the rain said in defense.

“Then give me one good reason why it wouldn’t,” the sunshine challenged.

“Well, for one, I take away the pollution of the air, filling it with moisture and freshness in which the world breathes.”

“Give me another one,” the sunshine challenged again.

“Do you see those beautiful flowers over there?” the rain asked.

“Yes,” the sunshine huffed.

“Well, I water the soil in which they are planted. I nurture the beauty of the world that you admire.”

“Go on, go on,” the sunshine urged.

“I replenish the rivers, the lakes, the oceans, and the seas so that the essential element of life may be bountiful and plenteous. I give life to the fish of the sea. Look at the various trees standing throughout the land. I protect them from being consumed by fire so they can fight diseases in the lower atmosphere. I nourish the soil in which they are planted, too. And in return, trees exhale pure oxygen into the air…the air in the sky in which so freely fly. Were it not for me, the fowl of the air would be extinct. And aren’t those shady green pastures just lovely? Well, I nurture the ground the ground in which they sit. So, were it not for me, those animals you see down there grazing in the meadows would surely cease to exist. And what about the crops of the field? Were it not for me, they would dry up and wither away and there would never be any harvest to reap, causing starvation to be prevalent in the land. You see, my friend, I ensure the existence of virtually all things. Were it not for me, there wouldn’t be air to breathe, food to eat, or water to drink. So while I may not be favored by the masses just because I cause temporary discomfort, I am quite essential to life. And you know what that means, don’t you?” the rain asked.

“I’m afraid I don’t,” the sunshine said with an attitude.

“It means that those people so-called basking in your splendor wouldn’t even appreciate you were it not for me.”

Exasperated and at a loss for words, the sunshine sighed and replied, “Well, you don’t have to rub it in!”

The discomfort caused by pain is actually for our growth and development. We may cry sometimes, but our tears do not fall on fallow ground. The shedding of our tears is a powerful phenomenon in and of itself. Our tears are symbolic of rain; they represent the showering of the air of our souls—the cleansing of our ailments and pain. Our tears represent the watering of the soil of our souls—the saturation of strength, faith, love, endurance, and peace. They also represent the replenishing of the sea of our souls—the flooding of wealth and prosperity. And the salt of our tears signifies the richness in which they flow. Finally, after the showering, watering, and replenishing, the rainbow of our soul appears and reveals its radiance; it lets us know that JOY IS ON ITS WAY!!

Verse of the Day: “In all things, God works for the good of those who love him.” - Romans 8:28


Have a wonderful weekend ahead people and be safe!

Monday, March 5, 2012

An Article & A Conversation

I don't read the SBM blog often but the other day my friend sent me this article. If you don't have the time to read it, the summary is basically a woman who got played. Met a dude, kept giving excuses whenever they had to go out, eventually went out, gave some bullshit excuse as to why he was still living with his baby momma and their kid, they had sex blah blah turns out it was all a ruse, he was in a relationship with his baby momma. It was confirmed, when he accidentally sent her a text saying "have to work late. kiss the baby for me. I love you" (You're better off just reading it).

Anyways, after I had read it, my friend goes "That guy was a bastard for what he did". I started thinking about the article and yea he was a bastard for what he did, but I have always had this notion that yea, men do what they do but usually they get away with stuff that we as women let them get away with. The article was an extreme but it's something most women have experienced. I really believe 99% of the time, we know when something is wrong/off/not right but for reasons unexplained we still hang in there while creating any and every excuse that vindicates him and makes you feel better or tides you over for the day.

There are many reasons for why this happens but meh, to me it's all part of the cycle of life. Everyone gets stupid at some point in their life, sometimes we learn from it, sometimes we don't. Life goes on. But we did continue our conversation on self esteem in women, to which the yeye boy exclaimed that low self esteem women were the best and easiest to mess with. The more emotionally fucked up they are the better (smh). He also said though that in actuality every woman is easy to fuck with because all we have to do is like a guy and once we do that we unconsciously give too much power to the guy. I had to completely agree with him. Like I said above, while I believe that we let guys get away with stuff, I also wondered what it's like to be a man and have that desire to eat their cake and have it even if it's at the expense of another person's emotions? Answers I'll never know.

Anyhue, the convo took a turn to my friend dogging the female sex and I didn't even bother trying to explain what it's like on this side as a female. It's a man's man's world and like I said in a previous post, Men are from Mars and Women from Venus. No matter how much we try, we are never going to get each other.

Have a fantastic week guys! :)

Thursday, March 1, 2012

[Guest] Friday Randoms

Howdy readers, been a minute huh? Woulda been an even longer minute if y'alls favorite guest randomer didn't send me stuff. I have been totally uninspired and just not up to it so my random/blogging tank is completely on E. Anyways hope you guys are doing well and enjoy!


On the eighth day, God created Whiskey.

It has occurred to me that throughout my time on this earth, I have never heard a non-Nigerian person use the word “Fumigate.”

I am convinced that while driving in traffic, the fastest lane is the one you just got out of. I am also convinced that there is never a red light when you need one. When I need to stop for a bit so as to send an important text or to dial a number to make an urgent call, ALL lights are green and the road is free flowing.

The other day, I got back to my office after a meeting and found a cupcake on my desk. Despite there being no note as to who left the cupcake, I ate it without the slightest fear that a co-worker could be trying to poison me. This is reason 6,946 why I LOVE America. God bless America abeg. If it was Nigeria, I would have said “My enemies shall never succeed” and thrown the cupcake in the dustbin.

Question for Lohi0, I was making scallops the other day and they came out a bit rubbery. Any tips as to what the best time/ method is for making pan seared scallops?

Dr. Wayne Dyer once said that “Good friends are God’s way of apologizing for our relatives.” He was spot on. I have some of the dearest friends in the world.

If the good Lord can see to it that a bolt of lightning strikes my neighbour’s ever loud and never silent barking dog, I will give an extra 10% in tithes. Walahi, it’s a covenant. We pray to the Lord, Lord hear our prayer.

Happy Lenten season to those of you that observe it but I have a question since I don’t. Now the idea of lent is to give up something for 40 days in an attempt to get closer to God. But if you have to give up something to get closer to God, why do it for 40 days? If something is an impediment to being closer to God, why not give it up altogether? Just my thoughts sha. Look forward to your responses.

While we are on the subject of lent, here’s an outstretched five fingered WAKA to those of you who give up sex for lent. If you want to give up something, why must it be something that affects your partner? After your 40 days are over you’re now down for loving again. NANsense.

I miss playing Ludo.

The 50 something year old woman in my office whose body can give J-Lo a run for her money is a walking sexual harassment lawsuit. In the words of Rashidi Yekini, “hand hi just luffit ”

I have said it before and it bears repeating. It is high time society puts a maximum height on geles during events. I mean why bother attending at all if we can’t see a damn thing because of the statuesque towers of Babel on your heads? Kilode?

Inspired by a friend, I have come up with a new side hustle. It involves going to Payless Shoe store to buy high heeled ladies shoes and Home Depot to buy a can of red paint. Who’s down?

I have been suffering from lower back pains for over a week now. So I went to spa and got an Ashiatsu massage. It was awesome and I felt like a new man. Later that day, I went to a friend’s house. He asked where I’d been and I told him I had just come from getting an Ashiatsu massage. He had no idea what it was and I described it to him and raved at how wonderful it felt, how the masseuse managed to soothe every aching muscle in my back etc. He looked at me in disgust, shook his head and said “You be comprehensive fool! You don kolo! You pay one hundred American dollars, not naira oh, dollars make pesin standa, dey match you for back.” I won’t lie, every feeling of relief dissipated afterwards.

Word of the day, Ultracrepidarian. I think you can think of people to whom it applies.

That’s about it folks. Wishing you a happy weekend and a great week ahead. In line with Taynement’s tradition, here’s a song to sign off.

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There you have it folks. This boy is crazy. You guys have a wonderful weekend. I am hitting the road again. As always, be safe!