The Source..

It's been a rough couple of months since I lost my mom. Sometimes, I look at myself and wonder how I am functioning. If you had ever told me how I would be if I ever lost my mom I would have told you I would have lost it, but here we are. Grief is a very strange thing. It's also a very confusing thing. You are full of questions but have no answers and won't get any because they are gone. It brings many different emotions that hit you at the weirdest times. Every little thing reminds me of my mom and I can think of a memory to attach to it. It's an odd thing continuing and acting like life goes on when your world has stopped. Sometimes, I feel like a crazy person. After the funeral it was much worse. I felt so lost (I still do). I felt like I was walking around with a gaping hole. I was so confused and I didn't know what the purpose of life or God was. I couldn't pray. I tried reading the bible but everytime I read something that alluded to God protects his own...

Today is a somber day in America. These occurrences against black people is getting too frequent and it's actually a bit frightening because really this could happen to any one of us. May the souls of all those lost rest in peace. Here we go with randoms dedicated to my friend, Swanboy. What's the line between confidence and arrogance? Pet Peeve: When people sound so sure about stuff they have no proof or know nothing about. It is quite common among Nigerians because for some reason saying "I don't know" is a crime. Sometimes I think my being single bothers other people more than me myself. I can't count the number of times I have been asked if I will do online dating. I don't know what the intentions or reasons are but I always side eye the question. Especially if I haven't complained to said person about not meeting people. I just find it annoying when people have some insight into my love life or lack thereof. Speaking of love life, it...

I saw this tweet on my TL: "Things people are struggling for, you get them easily without sweat. Without compromise. Just God's favour!" I think I may have said this in my randoms before but this tweet reminded me how the word favor rubs me off the wrong way. I totally get wanting to sing your blessings to the world but I truly think there are other ways to do so without being smug? obnoxious? (are those the right words?) We are told that God loves us all equally but when these self proclaimed favored people make these declarations, the word seems to take on a connotation like they are on a different level and are better in God's eyes. Like those who don't get them easily (to quote the lady above) are doing bad things and deserve to be punished. Once again, I am not saying the praises of God shouldn't be declared publicly but more oft than not these declarations often comes across as bragging under the guise of praising God. I think you can tell when a...