Abuse

I am currently overwhelmed and up to my eyeballs in abuse stories. I've always been very riled up whenever I hear of injustices against people. Life is not fair I know but I don't think I will ever understand why life is cruel. But abuse is just another level of cruelty that is not leveled to people by fate but by the hands of another human. I just finished Leaving Neverland and as much as I never believed MJ ever did those things, noone watching can deny the pain of those two men especially Jimmy Safechuck. This is not including R.Kelly's documentary. I have avoided the podcast about Larry Nasser because I don't think I can take it.

I am reading a book where a lady recounts her time as a counselor where she met a 13 year old who had had sex with 5 men and sucked off 10 men and currently had a 32 year old boyfriend who came by to pick her up everyday. Then the other day, a coworker from my former place of work was telling me how one of our coworkers was being beaten so badly by her (second) husband that she had to take a leave of absence to heal. What makes this worse is I remember when I started and she would walk around with a black eye and everyone was acting like it was normal. It wasn't till later that she told me how her first husband used to beat her and the day he died in an accident was the day she felt free and relieved. That's two men who decided to abuse her.

Abuse comes in all forms and too often we wonder why the older people who should be wiser "let" this happen or don't walk away. I am not going to judge because I won't lie it's a thought I have or maybe its just me willing them to be strong and leave but the thing with abuse is there are layers to it.

The Oprah Neverland interview was a very insightful one. She spoke about "grooming". You can see it in Michael's case. You can see it in R.Kelly's case. But it is the one common thread in all abuse. Where the abuser gets the victim to trust them. They fool them into thinking they are this trustworthy, nice person when the goal is really to begin the breakdown process where the victim mentally begins to disintegrate so when the abuse starts it becomes confusing because how can this awesome person do this to me. In some cases, they might not even acknowledge or worse, realize it's abuse. Then comes isolation/separation. Ugh. It's just such a terrible process.

Saw this in the magazine:





Just finishing the MJ documentary and the story about my coworker is what inspired this post because she has two young kids and I really felt so much rage. Whenever I hear these things, I always also think about the healing. Can they heal? Can the cycle be broken. Because as we know, I have watched many docus where abuse just seemed like it was genetically passed down. I just think some damage can't be healed. I am not even going to get into those men who abuse young, helpless kids because I don't even want to understand the rationale. That being said, all abuse is yuck. Whether sexual, emotional, verbal, domestic. All tueh. Each one takes away something from the victim's life.

Anyways, I don't know if I have a point. I am just really angry that it is so rampant. Really angry because I am not sure if there is anything I can do. Really angry that people have to suffer.

Bleh.


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