Taking Responsibility (?)

So I love Michael Buble. MB has a new song out called "Haven't met you yet". The song is pretty much about the quest for love but one line in the song stood out to me. MB sings, " I'm not surprised, not everything lasts, I've broken my heart so many times, I've stopped keeping track".

Ok so I liked the fact that he used "I" instead of "She". See as humans we always say, she/he broke my heart. But his use of I made me think that he probably used it the right way. At what point do we take responsiblity in our part for a break up. I mean I am sure there are exceptions when one party is totally blindsided but in most cases I think we can equate it to same way we say noone can hurt your feelings unless you let them, can this be applied to this too? Bear with me cuz I haven't fully thought this out.Like I said, I am sure there are blindside situations but for the most part there are signs(right?) and if we choose to ignore them and keep on trucking if the heartbreak comes, we played a part in it.

This train of thoughts led to me thinking about something I heard somewhere. Since women always seem to be complaining about being done wrong, if you really think about it and look at past failed relationships, you are the common factor in each one. Does it mean you are doing something wrong or it's just the luck of the draw and it's something you have to go through till you find the right person? I honestly don't know or have any answers but I'd like to hear what you guys think so feel free to comment. Have a nice week ahead.

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Below are the lyrics to the song, ultimately it says we will all find our special someone. I hope that prayer is answered for everyone :):

I'm not surprised.
Not everything lasts.
I've broken my heart so many times I stopped keeping track.
Talk myself in.
I talk myself out.
I get all worked up, then I let myself down.

I tried so very hard not to lose it.
I came up with a million excuses.
I thought I thought of every possibility.

And I know someday that it'll all turn out.
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And promise you, kid, that I'll give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

Mmmm...

I might have to wait.
I'll never give up.
I guess it's half timing,
And the other half's luck.
Wherever you are.
Whenever it's right.
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life.

And I know that we can be so amazing.
And baby your is gonna change me.
And now I can see every possibility.

Mmmm...

But somehow I know that it'll all turn out.
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And I promise you, kid, that I'll give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

They say all's fair.
And in love and war.
But I won't need to fight it.
We'll get it right and,
We'll be united.

Comments

CIL said…
I'm first! There's a Soulmate for everyone :)
My CILy pointed me in the direction of mine :)
Ok lemme stop gushing.
I agree that a lot of times, both parties play a part in the breakup but I know one situation where she was completely blindsided but then again I only know one side of the story.

Have a great week me CIL. Why am I feeling extremely happy? lol... I dunno... Ok now I am have a conversation with myself on your blog. I need to go take my meds :)
Myne said…
I love MB and that song is sweet.
Repressed One said…
There is a tendency for humans to blame others and not themselves. I think the older one gets the more one is likely to think about the part one might have played in break-up cos as you rightly said they are to common denominator.

As with most things in life, it’s not what happens to you, its how you deal with it. However, the fact that you decide to not let the heart break destroy you doesn’t mean the person didn’t cause you pain.

As per having a hand in your own heartbreak…I don’t know about that one.

There is always room for improvement but unless the woman is being dumped for the same reason all the time then it might just be her luck of the draw.

If that made no sense, blame my colossal headache...
Reverence said…
there must me something in teh music industry water, everybody has a new album. i aint complaning though.. nope not me.

i think the whole break up thing is because no one wants to admit they are wrong. thats whay the first stage of grief is denial.
Naijadiva said…
I love love love Michael Buble...! He makes me believe...

Anywhoo...

"In most cases I think we can equate it to same way we say no one can hurt your feelings unless you let them, can this be applied to this too?" ---> I don't see how this is possible because the simple fact that you are with this person means that you have invested your feelings in the relationship in some way, and you have essentially "let them".

I sorta see your point when you speak of taking responsibility, however, I don't necessarily think that one can completely blame oneself for a heartbreak and hold oneself accountable, unless of course the signs prior to the end are blatant. There are situations where you can see telltale signs, but I doubt that we can ever be 100% sure that there is really something amiss and the relationship is heading for the rocks. It could just be that at the moment, the couple is going through a rough patch that most relationships have to endure and many a times, people choose to stick it out for hope that they can work it out, and things will get better. Sometimes they do, sometimes they don't. My point is we can never be 100% sure. If it's meant to be, it will. If not, it'll be better in time... :)


Nice blog... :D

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