Ex. 1: This first one might just be an american thing or maybe even just an animal lover thing but exchanging notes on dog sitting and talking about paying almost $100 a night for doggy hotels? ewo, my money (and brain) no reach o.
Ex. 2: Girl is having a baby and her in-laws moved closer as per first grand child and all but explicitly let her know that they aren't here for babysitting duties. If they are in a bind or an emergency of course they will be there but other than that they are done with their child rearing duties and would like to have fun in their old age.
Ex. 3: Girl is dating someone new. The person is one of her ex's best friends but she doesn't care and neither does he. She asks me what I think, I answer with my African brainwash that it's messy and nke wa nke wa. She asks other white girl and she's like I don't see anything wrong with it. You are happy and you are both single. My husband dated my best friend. I swiveled so fast (because as long as I'd known her it was new info to me). I am like your best friend? - yup, was she okay with it? - nope is she still your best friend? - nope. But she didn't care and many years later they are married with a kid and life goes on.
I pondered over these examples and wondered if we as Africans have been so brain washed and have grown up just following rules that we don't even know why, while yt folks are just living their best lives by establishing boundaries and pursuing their happiness full throttle. I am not saying that we don't have rules and cultures that are beneficial to us but we do a lot of things out of duty and stay repressed with resentment. Most Nigerians I know would never go after someone their friend even talked to but for these women it's all game.
So what do you think? Are we holding ourselves back?